The Ben Maynard Program
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The Ben Maynard Program
EP. 81 "FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE"! The Drunk Show: A PSA on Responsible Drinking
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What happens when a podcast host consumes nine shots of tequila over two hours while tracking every change in his speech, coordination, and blood alcohol level? Ben Maynard's "Drunk Show" delivers a raw, unfiltered look at alcohol's progressive effects on the human body and mind — creating perhaps the most authentic public service announcement about responsible drinking you'll ever witness.
With St. Patrick's Day approaching, Ben transforms his regular Friday night livestream into a sobering demonstration with his daughter Tess serving as both observer and safety monitor. The episode unfolds as a real-time experiment: one shot every ten minutes, breathalyzer tests charting his journey from 0.007 to 0.12 BAC, and a field sobriety test that removes any doubt about alcohol's impact on motor skills.
What makes this episode particularly powerful is watching Ben's transformation. Early on, he maintains his typical conversational style while discussing music, sharing stories, and engaging with viewers. But as the shots accumulate, viewers witness his speech pattern slow, his thought process become fragmented, and his movements grow increasingly uncoordinated. By the ninth shot, even Ben acknowledges, "Forget about it. I'm blitzed."
Beyond the experiment itself, Ben delivers heartfelt warnings about drinking and driving, the dangers of lowered inhibitions, and how alcohol affects different body types differently. "Ladies, I'm looking out for you," he emphasizes, explaining how someone smaller than his 202-pound frame would feel the effects much faster.
Whether you're planning St. Patrick's Day celebrations or just want to understand alcohol's real effects, this episode offers valuable perspective without preaching. Subscribe to The Ben Maynard Program wherever you get your podcasts, and remember his parting message: "I do this so you don't have to."
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Show Introduction & Housekeeping
Speaker 1Well, hey there, welcome into the Ben Maynard program. Thanks for being here. Let's do a little bit of this first. Boom there, it is right there. Okay. Yes, thanks for being here. It is Friday night. We are live Isn't that great? And it's a special time this evening, 6 pm Pacific time, if you're watching, okay. So before we get started, let's take care of a little bit of housekeeping.
Speaker 1All right, as you know, this program is available wherever you get your podcasts All the major podcast streaming platforms. Just search the Ben Maynard program and it's there. You'll find it okay. If you do that, just subscribe to it and you'll get notifications whenever a new episode is published. However, this is Friday Night Live. This is a live stream. So if you're here, you're watching, and you're watching because you can't resist all of this right here, and if you are, thank you so much for doing so. Couple of things, though Please subscribe to the channel, leave me a thumbs up and leave me a comment. All right, I do love your comments. I read all your comments and I reply to them as well. Last but not least, follow me on Instagram.
Speaker 1Simply Ben Maynard program. All one word, all right. So plenty of ways to take in this show for your dancing and listening pleasure and with that, wow, all right, here we go, let's, let's get into this. Okay, um, let me do something here first. You know, this is really really upsetting. Every week, for the last I think, three weeks or four weeks, I've had to adjust my, like, my, and now it's not doing it. That's really kind of making me angry. Anyway, well, I guess I guess we're going with a. There we go. I guess we're going with the black name tonight. Black name and and the black scroll across the bottom of the screen. I don't know what's going on Last few weeks, the settings every time I check out of StreamYard, which is the service that I use to record all this stuff, it resets. I don't know, I don't get it. I don't know why. I haven't had time to really look into it or even contact the help desk. But whatever, it's not a big deal, all right. So the reason that we're here tonight is very, very important. I have made a couple of posts on Facebook about it. I let everybody know last week kind of let you know last Friday night what was going on and we're doing something a little bit special.
The Drunk Show Purpose Explained
Speaker 1Yes, as you can see across the bottom of the screen it says the Drunk Show. Well, yes, it is the Drunk Show, but it isn't for the purpose of getting drunk. This is my public service announcement to all of you out there. I'm a big proponent of responsible drinking. Okay, and this is the month of March. There, it is right. There, yeah, so I'm preparing everybody for St Patrick's Day, which is coming up on the 15th. No, I'm sorry, it's coming up on the 17th. I haven't had anything to drink yet, promise, but what we're going to do tonight is we're going to. Oh, there we go. Better late than never, I suppose. Right, especially when it's a live stream. You'll see, you'll see what happens. Yeah, there she is returning to the program.
Speaker 3Tess.
Speaker 1My lovely daughter Tess. Yeah, hi everyone. So the purpose of this is to bring awareness to responsible drinking, drinking and driving, all that you know that encompasses. Okay, as I said on the 17th, at St Patrick's day, as you can see, I'm wearing my lucky charm shirt here. Yes, I'm trying to celebrate a little bit.
Speaker 3I would have worn green too. I didn't know it was a themed one.
Speaker 1Well, it's not necessarily a themed one, but you know, I don't know if I've worn. I know I've worn in promos, but I don't know if I wore this actually in studio. For those of you who don't know and maybe you don't pay attention I'm sure you don't, nobody cares out there but go back the previous 80 episodes and see how many times I wore the same shirt twice. I think it's happened two times. So yeah, I always try to wear a different t-shirt or a different shirt for each episode.
Speaker 3Really.
Speaker 1Yeah, it's just a subtle thing. Let's see if anyone ever notices. And they really don't, okay, so anyhow. So what we're doing is, again, like I said, bringing awareness to responsible drinking. We don't want you out there drinking and driving on St Patrick's Day or the weekend leading up to that, because I'm sure there's going to be a lot of stuff going on. And in May, first week of May, on May the 5th, we have Cinco de Mayo, two big drinking holidays, bars, restaurants, always having, you know, green beer or margarita specials, whatever it is. And if you want to partake in all that stuff, then have at it. There's nothing wrong with that, that's fine, that is fine, but you have to do it responsibly, okay.
Speaker 1And what we're going to do, and it's going to start really in about, let me see, I think three minutes is every 10 minutes I'm going to take a drink of this beautiful tequila. This is a brand spanking new bottle, cava de Oro. I just bought this last week. I haven't even broken the tape, the seal. I haven't even broken the seal on this thing yet, so haven't even. I haven't even broken the tape, the seal, haven't even broken the seal on this thing yet. So every 10 minutes I'm going to take a drink, in my right here, my Mr Spock shot glass, and it still has the bean in here from like three weeks ago.
Speaker 1Um, because nobody called in. So there were no Malort challenges and yeah, no, trust me, that's okay, I don't mind. Um, and then Tess is here to kind of monitor what happens with me, what goes on. We have our breathalyzer right here and the first breathalyzer will come just before I take the third drink, so we'll be into this almost 30 minutes before I do my first breathalyzer. So what we have to do is we got to give the alcohol a little bit of time to get into my system and see how that all works out, okay, and go from there. But this is going to be a regular Friday night live regular show. We're just going to have some fun here. But we are going to be a regular Friday night live regular show. We're just gonna have some fun here, but we are going to, you know, try to convey a very important message to all of you out there.
Speaker 3Yeah, this is an energy drink.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah. Yeah, Tess is not is not consuming any alcohol with me. That's not going to happen.
Speaker 3I'm here to monitor.
Speaker 1Yep, tess is here to monitor and we'll get into these things as we move along. So it is what it's about. Eight minutes after, yeah, so at least let's get the first drink prepared.
Speaker 3I have a question. I think you've answered this for me before. But like, why does the like top of it have liquor in it? I mean, like, what's the significance?
Speaker 1It's got one full shot inside the cap so that is the liquor yes, that's, yeah, that's the tequila inside the top?
Speaker 3yeah, of course sure and then what's the point of it?
Speaker 1I think it's just for looks. And then when? You're finish the bottle, you can keep this when you're sad and you finish the whole bottle, you can look back at the top and say oh, I still have more. I've got at least one more drink.
Speaker 3How much is one full shot? Like one and a half ounces.
Speaker 1It's two ounces, two ounces. Yeah, what's that?
Speaker 3It's a little light for two ounces.
Speaker 1No, it's right about there, oh ew.
Speaker 3Oh, I touched the top of it. Now my hand smells like it.
Speaker 1Oh no, this is really really good stuff Actually.
Speaker 3Yeah, it's not horrible, it's fine.
Speaker 1This one, this tequila. This was a favorite at one of our tequila tastings. This was the one that pretty much took over everything.
Speaker 3Which one's this called?
Speaker 1Cava de Oro. I remember that. Okay, it is 10 after, so we're going to stay consistent with this. Let me get something off the screen here, okay, and get that off, yeah. And then let me move into the comments too, okay, just in case people comment. I can't read that I really can't, all right, so we're going to stay on schedule. 10 minutes after boom down the hatch I got that bean too.
Speaker 3Is that the thing you like? Have a jelly bean when you take the shot.
Speaker 1Well, this stuff is just so delicious, why am I wasting it on this particular program? I don't know why. All right, so can you get a timer set for 10 more minutes? Actually, yeah, set it for 10.
Speaker 3Set a timer for 10 minutes, please. What?
Speaker 1is it? Oh, it's set. Okay, See, you just talk to it. She just that's what youngsters do to it. She just that's what youngsters do Sufficiency, oh, okay, anyway.
Speaker 3And look, now we have it right there.
Speaker 1The bean. Yeah, okay, the bean.
Speaker 3The bean.
Speaker 1Actually, that bean has been in there, because when I for the Malort challenge and that was actually tasty it was I thought it was going to be a hot one, but it wasn't. Not only do I have to take a shot of Malort, but then I put to, you know, to make the punishment even worse, that I put a bean boozled bean in the bottom of the shot glass.
Speaker 3Really yeah.
Speaker 1And still I don't get people to engage. The comments are up, so if anybody out there watching you want to make a comment, oh, let me do this also. Sorry, let me put the number on the screen. We all know it's the drunk show now. So anybody out there, if you want to call in, we'll take your call and, yeah, it's a regular show. So here's where we're going to start with Friday Night Live. Okay, let's go right here. Put the old spectacles on. Oh, awesome, what. Today is National Cereal Day, tess.
Speaker 3And you're wearing a cereal shirt. I'm wearing. Yeah, that's cool.
Speaker 1I'm wearing a cereal shirt, aka Lucky Charms and uh, but I haven't had any cereal today.
Speaker 3Oh, that's unfortunate what do you? Have on hand. What would you have? Uh it's not over yet.
Speaker 1That's true, that's true. And if things go as well as I would like them to go, I can always go downstairs after the show and have some. If things go as you probably want them to go, I'm going to walk straight across the hallway to the bedroom and fall out. Let's see, we have Frosted Flakes. Then we have something a special I think it's a special edition one Frosted flakes like glazed donut holes or something like that. It's terrible, it is, it's terrible.
Speaker 3I had to go to grandpa when we gave him the donut. Sorry, it's not terrible, I just remember he ate the donut and he was like it's terrible, just scoot up a little bit, all right All right?
Speaker 1Well, scoot your chair up, that's all. Just scoot your chair up, then. What else do we?
Speaker 3have, oh, we have Crave Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate.
Speaker 1Crave. Do we have Cinnamon Toast Crunch? We don't have any Cinnamon Toast Crunch. We do have some Quaker, like some kind of granola cereal. That's your mom's. You can tell all the kids' cereals are mine. Yeah, I mean, come on Serious. Today's also National Flapjack Day. I'm missing out on pancakes. I'm missing out on cereal.
Speaker 3I'm done. You want to know what's next Friday.
Speaker 1That's the 15th. What's next Friday?
Speaker 3The 14th.
Speaker 1Oh, 14th. Yes, that's, right.
Speaker 3Pie day.
Speaker 1Yes, oh, I'm going to load up for that. We're going to get some pies. Yeah, I don't know if we're going to be here next Friday. I'm not sure. It depends on what comes my way this week.
Speaker 3You can have pizza and like a Marie Callender's pie, that's it.
Speaker 1Pizza pie, apple pie, chocolate pie, whatever kind of pie, hand pie.
Speaker 3I like those. Yeah yeah, what brand is that? Like miss reds or something hand pie well, I haven't, like you know, like the little ones that they have like and they're like fruit pies, but they're like little ones oh, like you get at the, like you get at the grocery store, oh, and I'm not sure the name of those um but you know what I'm talking about. Yeah, glazed everything. Yeah, I know what you'm talking about. They're glazed everything.
Speaker 1Yeah, I know they're so good actually, when you said ham pie, I was thinking about this. This, um, this bakery in the fairfax district they, they make a hand pie, that's what they call it, but it looks like their version of the pop tart that sounds delicious, yes, it is, it is so anyway, all right.
Speaker 1So National Cereal Day, and we've got what like five more minutes before the next drink. Okay, so let's see what else. National Cereal Day, yes, of course. National Flapjack Day oh my gosh, I'm missing out on all of it. Well, national Chili Day, I think was last Friday.
Speaker 3I missed that one.
Speaker 1Yeah, I had told your mom and she didn't make any chili. We did end up having some, but not till, I think, sunday is when we made it, so we were late to the party on National Chili Day. But anyway, so celebrity birthdays. Today it's really light on celebrity birthdays because, as I told you last week, I'm sorry, tiktok stars and I recognize anyone of course you can yeah, hang on, that's right, yeah, let me turn the ip this.
Speaker 3Oh my gosh, whoa Vicky. So she's interesting. She used to like talk like kind of ratchet and stuff and she was just like really weird. But she had like a whole coming to Christ thing and now she's like super religious and that's like what she's about. But she did have a really she had a really weird like thing going on in like the late 2010s probably, but okay that's her. I'm surprised it's her birthday. Who else is on here?
Speaker 1oh, brian cranston well, yeah, I was gonna let you go through all these, these ones that are insignificant, before I got to brian cranston that's okay that's okay, I don't know anyone else on, yeah, uh, yeah, there's, you know, nobody, like I said, of any significance except Brian Cranston, because I don't count YouTube stars and TikTok stars and Instagram stars. That's just silly.
Speaker 3Well, happy birthday, Brian Cranston. He's 69 today, yeah, so have you seen Breaking Bad at all Ben.
Speaker 1I have not Breaking.
Speaker 3Bad. Did you see Malcolm in the Middle?
Speaker 1I saw a little bit of Malcolm Malcolm in the middle when it was when it was first run.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1But not a lot. But I probably the most I've seen of Brian Cranston in any one thing is when he did a. He did a few episodes, two or three episodes of King of Queens. Yeah, so that's about my, my big run on Bryan Cranston. Let's see what else do we have here.
Speaker 3Oh my gosh, I think Maddie was watching.
Speaker 1Yeah Well, good Maddie, good, if you're watching, maddie, just keep watching.
Speaker 3How do we know she's here?
Speaker 1I don't know. I know there's people watching because I can see.
Speaker 3Oh.
Speaker 1Oh right, okay. So this day in history, this day in history, we're going to go back, we're going to start. Let me put my glasses on. Let's not try to pretend I can see without them. Let's start in.
Speaker 3Oh, I think mom commented something.
Speaker 1Oh, somebody left a comment. All right, well, we'll get the way the letters look.
Speaker 3It looks like it says Catherine yeah, I think it does. And there's a heart emoji 1876.
Speaker 1I'm going to throw this to you as a trivia question who?
Speaker 3patented the telephone. Oh, I don't know that one I can tell you the light bulb. Or the assembly line. Who did all that?
Speaker 1I can't tell you the telephone. Good thing we are not playing Bean Boozled yet. Alexander Graham Bell oh okay, I've you the telephone.
Speaker 3Good thing we are not playing being boozled yet. Uh, alexander Graham bell. Oh I, okay, I've heard, I've heard, I've heard the name, I've heard the name. I think I learned that one point in elementary school.
Speaker 1Well, there was a. There was a, actually a phone company named after him. There was Splintered off. Depending on where you were in the country, you got Pacific Bell and this bell, southern Bell, all kinds of stuff. So anyway, that was in 1876. How about let's see 1923. All right, robert Frost's Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening is published. I've never even heard of that book. I've heard of Robert Frost, the author, but never that book. I don't know. Okay.
Speaker 3He's the one, isn't his the like. Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, isn't that him?
Speaker 1If she got that right, somebody let us know, and if she did, she's awesome and knows more about it than I do.
Speaker 3But what was the one it said? The book is Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening it sounds like the same guy wrote these things, okay, okay, well, there's a minute left on the timer.
Speaker 1Oh, we got a minute left. Okay, minute left.
Speaker 3Diversion of Yellowwood and I took the one less traveled by Robert Frost.
Speaker 1Hey, what's that? What's that?
Speaker 3quote again it's called the Road Not Taken. Two roads diverged in a yellow wood and, sorry, I could not travel both and be one traveler. Long I stood and looked down one as far as I could to where it bent in the undergrowth. I shall be telling this with a sigh. Somewhere, ages and ages hence, two roads diverged in a wood and I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.
Speaker 1Okay, all right. Yeah, see, she's smart. She is smart. Alright, let's see. In 1988, the Writers Guild of America strike begins. I didn't even remember them going on strike. I guess it's time for another drink, right, alright?
Speaker 3I can make the timer anything you want, by the way.
Speaker 1Oh, the music, yeah, oh, I don't care.
Speaker 3Okay, I'll do something fun. Then I just thought about it. If we have the timer going off 10 minutes, I want it to be something fun.
Speaker 1Yeah, okay. So some of you might be asking why Tess is in studio tonight rather than Catherine. Well, catherine's at church on a women's function tonight and tomorrow, and so what's that? Is that what it's going to do. So I asked Tess if she would accompany me in studio and come hang out with me. So here we go, cheers.
Speaker 3Cheers.
Speaker 1I wish I was enjoying this better.
Speaker 3But okay, we have another timer set.
Speaker 1Okay, and it's already set, it's already set. Good.
Speaker 3When you threw it down the hatch, I pushed the button Excellent.
Speaker 1So what we're gonna do is, in 10 minutes, before I take the next drink, we're going to check and see if we have any registered alcohol level in the breathalyzer, which we should, but we shall see, let's see, and then. So what we're going to do also is we'll do the breathalyzer Tess, is going to try to keep track, not keep track, but let's see, we've done two drinks. Let me kind of put a couple of little matchsticks right here, and but she's going to observe any changes in my speech pattern? Am I slurring my?
Speaker 1words, I feel like I should have a notebook. Well, I've got my notebook right here. I suppose you can always scribble notes on the side if you want to. I will. You can Later on, probably after we get maybe six or seven drinks in. Then we're going to, in fact, I have to send Tess an email. We're going to, in fact, I have to send Tess an email. I have to send her a link so she can get on her phone and she's going to follow me downstairs and out to the patio and she's going to conduct a field sobriety test. So we'll see how that goes too. Walk a straight line, stand on one foot, say the alphabet, backwards, all that kind of silly stuff. You know, whatever, whatever she says, she's going to be Officer Tess at this point.
Speaker 3Lauren said she has this one, are your?
Speaker 1friends texting you right now. Oh my God, so her girlfriends are texting her. By the way, what did your mom say? After a few more shots, tess will take over the show. Oh yeah, okay, tess is going to take over the show, you guys can't see it, but he has the setup probably like 10 feet away.
Speaker 3So I see the comment there, but we really have to squint and get close to read it.
Speaker 1I was hoping, but I was hoping to get an squint and get close to it. I was hoping, I was hoping, but I I was hoping to get an HDMI cable and run it around and hook it to that television on the wall and use it as a monitor for the comments. I don't want to. I want to ignore it, except for to read comments, because I'll be here looking at the television, the entire broadcast talking, and I won't be looking at the audience. So, but one of these days. Hey, you went to a show last night I did.
Speaker 1Tell us about it.
Speaker 3It was awesome. Yeah, it was this dance pop Euro dance inspired kind of groovy band and they're called Confidence man. They are originally from Australia but they live in London now and something really cool. It's like from the videos I showed you it's that girl and the guy on stage dancing, but there's actually four members to this band, but we don't know what the other two people look like. They have a dj and a drummer and they wear these hats that have like full, like like black capes down past their faces okay and those people you know they'll get in and do a dance or something, or the one behind the dj.
Speaker 3He's just there the whole time and even they released a youtube video. They did um behind the scenes with them in dublin. They just played a show in. Dublin a few weeks ago and they blurred his face in the video when it went on YouTube.
Speaker 1I see, I see. So they don't really play any music. It's the DJ is providing the music and the drummer. He's providing a drum beat.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 1Okay, I got you, you know, covering their faces for anonymity purposes, it's. It seems that that's starting to become a thing a little bit. It's starting to catch on and become a little more popular. You know, I me, being almost 60 years old, the first, the first you know music act that I could recall taking that route was Kiss. You know, now, they didn't cover their faces, they didn't wear masks, but of course they wore the full makeup on their faces and you knew their names but you didn't know what they look like outside of the makeup and they kept that secret for the first 10 years that the band was in existence, really, yeah, but then you had bands like uh, let me think I was thinking red hot chili peppers, like.
Speaker 3What's his name? Fleet? Was he the one who would like? Uh, I don't remember or was it limp biscuit? Limp biscuit, their guitarist he would like do. Like the makeup on his face that I'm not.
Speaker 1Honestly, I'm not sure I don't know Limp Bizkit uh at all, other than I know the name. But you know, like Slipknot, all those guys wear masks. Um, then you've got Ghost. Uh, where, um, uh, what's his name? Uh, where, what's his name? Ford, no, forge is his last name. It starts with a T, doggone it His first name yeah.
Speaker 3Is it unique?
Speaker 1Well, he's from Sweden, I think.
Speaker 3I think he is. Is it like a cultural name? No, it's not.
Speaker 1Tiberius, it's shoot. I can, he is. Is it like a cultural name? No, it's not Tiberius, it's shoot. I can't recall. But anyway he's been anonymous. The whole entire band was pretty anonymous, oh, but they kind of change in and out Tobias, tobias, that's it, and now we know his name, but he still changes characters, these guys. Yeah, there you go. He still changes characters and introduces himself as a new character quite often. Um then there's another band.
Speaker 1I just heard their name today so that's them oh, that's them okay, gotcha and then they'll sit on them and yeah, um, I can't remember, but somebody was saying they're kind of a ripoff of slipknot, so but it seems that the anonymity thing is kind of a thing now I think it's cool and I wonder about this band.
Speaker 3They've only been around for maybe I mean releasing full albums for the past six years, five, six years. So I do wonder. And they're still pretty, pretty like low-key. You know what the tickets were?
Speaker 340 at the fonda theater yeah um, and it wasn't even a packed house, there was room. Yeah, so I think, as they grow, I wonder what's gonna happen if they, you know, eventually reveal who they are, or if they keep the anonymity, because they don't even have their own personal instagram pages or anything like that, they just have the group instagram right so they even do remain a bit the even the front people remain a little bit like mysterious in that way by not having that individual page for themselves how did they come on your?
Speaker 3radar. Um, one of my friends, um I was. I was talking to him about this other band I like called LCD sound system and they've been around for like 20 years now. So they're they're awesome, but they're like electronic indie disco, vibes, um, but I we were talking about that band. Then he said oh, I just heard about this other band, confidence man, I think you'd like them Listen to them, listen to to them the whole car ride home. And then I made my roommates listen to them. They fell in love with the band and last night when we were at the concert, my roommates just kept saying like we all kept hugging. It was such just a fun kept hugging.
Speaker 3Oh, how sweet it is we just kept hugging each other and summer my roommate just said oh, thank you, test, for showing us confidence. Man, this is the best concert I've ever been to and, honestly, okay, it was though like I'm telling you, ben, it was insane, you're, you're lucky I'm here tonight. I was gonna go down to san diego and see them play. Oh, just kidding, I would have, though.
Speaker 1She would have. She would have punked out on me and I'd be here all by myself and pretty soon pass out.
Speaker 3But coincidentally tomorrow LCD sound system's playing in San Diego and I am going to that.
Speaker 1Well, tomorrow your mother and I are going to Boots in the Park and we're going to see Brooks and Dunn.
Speaker 3I know If I didn't already have that ticket, I would have definitely wanted to go see Brooks and Dunn. It's going to be good, I know. If I didn't already have that ticket, I would have definitely wanted to go to Seabrooks and Dunn.
Speaker 1It's going to be good. So what else? Let me see what else on this day in history.
Speaker 3You got about a minute left on that timer, all right, just letting you know.
Speaker 1Cool, oh, let me get my glasses on here. Well, on this day in 1999, stanley Kubrick died. Stanley Kubrick was a movie director. I think he was a writer as well. He had movies like Clockwork Orange. What else did he do? Oh, he did that movie Eyes Wide Shut, with Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman he did. There's another one. Clockwork Orange is a really, really big Stanley Kubrick film. But he did another one. I'm trying so many and I can't even think of them right now.
Speaker 3Then let's see it was Shining oh man, that was so good. And A Space Odyssey?
Breathalyzer Test & Drunk Stories
Speaker 1Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes thinking that was so good and a space odyssey. Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, that's right. 2001 space odyssey Um, let's see. In 2010, catherine Bigelow becomes the first female director to win an Oscar, and I don't remember what movie that was. It was, um, darn. What movie was that? Somebody tell me? Somebody put it in the comments. Come on, a little participation here. As you can see, there it is Okay.
Speaker 3Man, those ducks are getting crazy out, there Are they swimming in the pool again.
Speaker 1Bananas. Okay, so the next drink, the third drink's ready to go do that first, that might oh yeah, no, no, no, the, the breathalyzer is coming first, okay, so I'll make notes of what you're blogging it's on okay can I write on the back?
Speaker 3uh, you can write. Just write on that page, yeah, just write on the page. Yeah, just make some notes, okay, so we'll put two shots, okay.
Speaker 2Blow.
Speaker 1Okay, it clicks and now it's calculating. Okay, it's not very measurable right now it says it says a 0.007%, 28 minutes until sober and then first shot was uh first shot was at 6 10, second was at 6 20 6, 10 and now we're at well, we're actually at 6 33, but that's okay all right, restarting the timer so 0.007, not very high at all, but it does tell you.
Speaker 1It'll tell you you know how much time before you're sober, and it said 28 minutes until I'm sober. Now, of course, that alcohol content it's going to increase. If I didn't take that third shot right now, if we gave it another five to 10 minutes, I'm sure it's going to go up because it's more time for the alcohol to absorb in my system. Now I'm not going to speak to you like a professional or an expert, because I'm not gonna speak to you like a professional or an expert because I am not any of those, but I am gonna speak to you as a friend and a concerned member of society. Okay, and you know, alcohol affects everybody differently.
Speaker 1Me, I'm almost twice Tess's size. You know I'm six foot. You know last week I was weighing 206. Today I got on the scale I was 202. So I dropped a couple of pounds. Tess, she's five, seven, she's probably about a buck and a quarter. Right, okay, she, she's not going to say but so she's little, she's little, yeah, sure, why not? So she's little. Now, those two shots probably would have a different effect on her within that first 30 minutes. We're not going to test it out, not tonight, tonight, but that's how alcohol interacts with your system. The smaller you are, the quicker it's going to have an effect on you. And, of course, most people most people are not taking a shot every 10 minutes, but if I waited even 15 minutes, we would probably be here till midnight. And well I would. You wouldn't because you would check out. They would all check out.
Speaker 3Yeah, I would check out, yeah.
Speaker 1Just like Tess asked me earlier. She says how, how long, how long is this going to take, like when's it going to be over? You know like a couple hours or what. And I said I like I don't know, well, I'm going out tonight.
Speaker 3So I mean, yeah, I just want to make sure that when mom gets home, that we have someone to supervise you oh, just in case, just in case I was gonna make sure I wasn't gonna leave him here all by himself. Yeah, that would have been pretty messed up if I did that. I said, okay, bye.
Speaker 2Ben.
Speaker 3Ben's struggling.
Speaker 1That's right, that's right.
Speaker 3I wouldn't do that to you.
Speaker 1So, so, like I said, we're just going to do a lot of the regular stuff that we normally do Talk, music, you know, bands, things that are things that are have been going on during the course of the week. Oh, by the way, I really truly hope, I truly hope that you all listen to my conversation with Larry Reedy on his podcast that that that's been out now about 12 days, I think days. I think it'll be two weeks on Sunday. Man, so good, such a great conversation him and I had. We talked about a lot of stuff, but we tried to stay a lot in the music space. We talked a lot about podcasting and kind of how we got started in it, things like that. But Larry is just such a great guy.
Speaker 1So, if you haven't checked it out, really honestly, I'm not saying it because I'm on there, although, yeah, I am saying it because I'm on there it's my first guest appearance on any podcast ever in the history of ever, so I was excited about it and I thought it went over really well. So it's Larry Reedy's America Okay, and it's on all of the streaming platforms. So just wherever you get your podcast, it's there, or you can just go right to his website, that's LarryReedynet, and all the episodes are there. Or you can just go right to his website, that's LarryReadynet, and all the episodes are there. So, anyways, yeah, so what else? What else?
Speaker 1Oh all right, you guys know how much time do I have anyway.
Speaker 3About five.
Speaker 1Okay, I got time for this one.
Speaker 3And a half.
Speaker 1So you all know how much I dig Kiss. I love the band. Kiss, okay, journey. Kiss one, two, one, one, a, whatever and, as you know, kiss they called. They kind of hung it up as far as touring and and really a lot of everything. Um, what? December of 2023? I think it was. Yeah.
Speaker 1And so Gene Simmons almost right away he started doing some shows as the Gene Simmons Band. So he's got his own thing going on and they did stuff in Europe last year. This year they're actually doing some stuff in the United States. I think it might start next month and it goes for a couple of months. But look, if you know anything about KISS at all over the years, especially the last 30 years, wherever KISS can make a buck, they're going to make a buck. And so this is right up Gene Simmons' alley. I just heard this one today that Gene is offering to anyone during the course of this tour here in the United States the opportunity to be his personal assistant for the day. So the day of each show will be a new one and you'll hang out with him all day, all night, be his roadie, whatever.
Speaker 1All for the low, low price of like $12,500. Yes, you have to pay, you have to pay. It's basically an all-day meet and greet is what it is, and it doesn't even include a ticket to the show. So after your time with Gene is up and the curtain's about ready to fall and the show's going to start, gene's kicking. Yeah, he's going. Yeah, now go to the ticket booth and go buy a ticket. Go drop another 50 or 100 bucks, whatever the ticket is. I thought that was funny. I got a kick when I heard that Now I'm sure you're going to get some stuff. You know, you probably get like you know he might throw you a bass guitar or something that he played during the show and I'm sure he'll give you some other tchotchkes. You know that kind of thing, and I'm sure he'll give you some other tchotchkes. You know that kind of thing. It won't be nearly $13,000 out of your pocket for absolutely nothing just to hang out and talk with him. But I just thought that was kind of funny.
Speaker 3That is, that's ridiculous. But I'm telling you Someone's going to pay for it.
Speaker 1Yep, yep, Someone's going to do it. It's one per show. One per show.
Speaker 3There's going to do it. It's one per show, one per show, so it's going to be a wait list Somebody's going to. They're going to start bidding.
Speaker 1Yeah, somebody's going to drop. Somebody's going to drop some coin for that but yeah under three minutes under three. Okay, well, we got time to pour this one here, and so this will be a shot number four. Yes, and what we'll do before we take the next one.
Speaker 3Let's see, you're at three right now.
Speaker 1Yeah, so we'll do two. Then, before we do the third, we did the breathalyzer. Now we did that one, we'll do another one, which will be four, and then, before we take the fifth shot, we'll hit the breathalyzer again and see how things are going. So now I'll tell you this I don't I've probably been drunk like four times in my whole life. Oh, I've got some comments here. Ben, it's lauren. Would you, oh, would I? Would you, oh, would I pay for it? No, I would not pay for it, lauren, sorry, sorry, sober, sally, thanks for watching. I'm glad you're watching. Is Michael with you? You, um, so, um, where was I going with this? Oh, yeah, so I've. I've only been, really only been drunk like four times and one of those times I actually roofied myself.
Speaker 1What, yeah I? I didn't. What do you mean? I didn't, I didn't even realize it well, you gotta clarify that.
Speaker 3You just said that on the what's up, michael?
Speaker 1I know, I know I don't think.
Speaker 3I know this story.
Speaker 1You might, it wasn't intentional at all. I'll tell you what After I take this next drink because it's coming up, right, it's coming up in under a minute.
Speaker 3You're under 50 seconds.
Speaker 1You know me, it's going to take a few minutes to get this one out, yeah, so we'll wait, I'll take the shot and then uh, then I'll get into the story was.
Speaker 3Can you tell me at least like when it was? Oh gosh like, were you like a youngin?
Speaker 1no, no, well younger, but I was probably about 12 or 13 years ago oh yeah, yeah, so I was still an older man. Um, I wasn't a young kid. We'll get into some of my drunk stories. We'll get into some of them in. You know, as as we move along, I do have some music stuff coming along too. I really do, I really do see, I've got stuff right here and stuff right here on the shelf that I want to show you.
Speaker 1But you know, gosh, 10 minutes goes by like fast there it is, it's it, it's coming up, huh, nope that's it oh there's the duck, all right, so down the hatch with number five. Oh yes, cheers, it's bad manners. Yeah, cheers.
Speaker 3Is it kind of satisfying? I'm tallying them off.
Speaker 2Hmm, four.
Speaker 1Okay, so before we take five, that's when we'll hit the breathalyzer again. Okay, see what it says? All right, so yeah, it was gone to a. It was a birthday party. What happened here?
Speaker 3We're going to tell you right now, Maddie, what happened.
Speaker 1Yeah, this is yeah. All right, You're at a birthday party. It was a birthday party.
Speaker 3Whose birthday party Like a child, an adult.
Speaker 1No, no, no, no Adult.
Speaker 3Okay, it was an adult party.
Speaker 1It was an adult party. No, no, no, no Adult, it was an adult party. It was an adult party. And um, and these folks know that, you know they always relied on me to bring my tequila and um, because I would bring all kinds of it. I would bring five, six, seven bottles and we would just, we would drink, we would celebrate, we would drink and, you know, have a good old time. We'd done it more than once and you know, everything was fine.
Speaker 1So I'm at this party now and I'm just about ready to eat and, as you know, I suffer from migraine headaches. I don't know, I'm sorry if I told the story already on the show before in the past. I haven't heard it, but this is episode 81, okay, don't know, I'm sorry if I told the story already on the show before in the past, but we're, this is episode 81. Okay, so not everybody has seen all 80 episodes previous to tonight, anyhow, um, so I, I, I feel a migraine coming on. Why I see a migraine coming on? Cause then I can't see, and for those of you don't suffer from migraine headaches, you know it's coming on because your vision is now impaired. You, it's like someone's shining a flashlight in your face and so it's, it's. It's difficult to see. So I always carry my meds with me. You know I have a kit or it's, you know, whatever I always, I've always got my meds with me, me, you know, I have a kit or you know, whatever I always, I've always got my meds with me.
Speaker 3He's prepared. He is prepared. His mantra is better to have and not need than to need and not have yes man, yeah, I love it, I love it. Tess, you remember these things, that's good I know it's good, just like two roads diverged in a yellow hood, but anyway, keep going, okay? So you have your pit.
Speaker 1So I go out to my truck that was when I had the white Hummer, aw yeah, and I go take my stuff, but I didn't say anything to anyone. I told nobody.
Speaker 3You just quietly disappeared.
Speaker 1I just went out really quick, took my stuff and went back in I eat and probably within 20 to 30 minutes we're drinking, we start drinking.
Speaker 2Sweet.
Speaker 1Yeah sweet.
Speaker 3What were you drinking?
Speaker 1Tequila, I don't even remember. Probably Classe Azul, probably La Pinta, probably even some Tequipal Maddie's listening along. All right, yeah.
Speaker 3I love you, maddie, so yes, learn from this, Maddie.
Speaker 1Okay, you have an experience. I may or may not share it tonight.
Speaker 3No, you're not, You're not. Anyway, get on with your story.
Speaker 1So you're drinking, so we start, so we start drinking Now now we probably put down about 12 shots and normally I'm okay. I mean, I'm not okay to drive, I'll let you know that, but I'm okay. And there was, in fact Jake was at the party too.
Speaker 3I remember Jake was there, I think it was supposed to be the party too. I remember Jake was there. I think it was supposed to be the party of the year.
Music Talk: The Outfield Albums
Speaker 1It was a good party. They had an inflatable boxing ring back there, big giant boxing gloves. You go in there and start slugging it out. It was fun and it was probably around midnight, so it was still sort of early, you know, and I'm sitting on the edge of this boxing ring and when did you start drinking?
Speaker 3when did you take this like medication?
Speaker 1time wise, I couldn't tell you exactly, um, but we probably started drinking about maybe eight o'clock or so right after you took the medication 20, 20 minutes or so, 20 minutes or so, maybe 30 minutes tops, and and then, uh, you know, we're just, you know, taking some shots, and I normally don't just pound shots because it's a waste of good tequila, but you know, when you're in a celebratory mood, you, you know you do.
Speaker 3Yeah, you have shots when it's like a friday night and you're having a live podcast, exactly, exactly, yeah, which is dubbed the drunk show, right?
Speaker 1so, um, so we're about probably 12 shots in and I'm sitting on the edge of this, uh, this boxing ring, and the next thing I know is I've got one person on this side of me, one person on this side of me, and they're lifting me up and they're saying come on, let's go, it's time to go home. And I knew nothing. I could and my I couldn't keep, I couldn't hold my head up and, of course, I didn't drive home. I'm in the passenger seat being driven home and everything was obscured, was was um, what is it when, like, all the lines are just extended out?
Speaker 3they're like long streaks, um, I don't know like they're, uh like it's a stigmatism in your eye, but um, whatever it was action of the light. I know what you're talking about, though.
Speaker 1But everything was like long streaks all the lights, taillights on the vehicles. I couldn't even hardly hold my head up. I remember having to pull over it. Well, having the truck pulled over at one point and I thought I was going to puke and I didn't. So I was like just give me some fresh air.
Speaker 2And.
Speaker 1I'm thinking what of share? And I'm thinking what is going on here? I've never, ever passed out, never passed out at that point. And yet home I remember pulling in the driveway, remember the truck pulling in the driveway, and then the next thing I the next thing I remember I wake up and the passenger door is open, so the dome light is on inside the truck and I'm all by myself. I'm like all right, what's going on here? So I get myself out of the truck and I tried to stand up and I was like, oh no, this isn't happening. So I got down on my hands and knees and I crawled up the sidewalk, the front sidewalk, into the front door door and I hit the front door handle Like so crawled in, didn't even close the door, went straight around the stairs, down the hallway into the bathroom and puked right in the toilet. And I'm still trying to figure out what's going on. And I'm just you know, there's video footage of it too. Uh, what's going on? And I'm just you know, there's video footage of it too.
Speaker 3I don't have it.
Speaker 1Thankfully, who would have it? I don't know if Jake has it or not. Jake, yeah, he may not, but but Sherry might have it. She did for a while. So so then Bo comes in, bo. He comes in and he's like, oh, taking. So then Bo comes in, bo. He comes in and he's like, oh, taking care of me and everything. Next thing I know I wake up. I look at my watch it's like five. I don't know how I could see. Yeah, it's about five, five, 30.
Speaker 3Okay, what makes this story so funny that I didn't even think about. So I had the visual in my head of you like up the sidewalk crawling, yeah, but it makes it way funnier. Like that it was night for some reason.
Speaker 2I was like I'm asking it like no, no, no, no, it's like in the dark yeah.
Speaker 3Was there like a porch light on, or was it just dark?
Speaker 1Uh, you know what it's been so long.
Speaker 1I don't recall if the porch light was on or not, but when next to me. So he's like comforting me on the floor of the bathroom and we, we come upstairs and I remember walking up the stairs and I'm like man, I'm like I'm wasted is what I'm thinking to myself, and I'm whole. I obviously have to use the handle to get up the stairs and I just I climb into bed, boom, crash out. And I remember it was summer. Yeah, it was in the middle of the summer, because the next day was Brady's birthday, that's, that's my grandson, Tessa's nephew. It was his birthday and I remember I was like I had my sunglasses on the whole day, even in the house.
Speaker 1It was just like sitting here like this, I didn't, I wasn't hung over, I didn't get sick after that, but man, I felt terrible, felt horrible and I'm thinking what is going on here? I couldn't understand it and it was I think it was two days later and it just hit me like that and I was like oh, wait a minute here, Let me check this out. And I walked out and I grabbed my, my, my meds, and I looked at the bottle and it says do not take with alcohol. And that was the, the, I'm a Trex and I was like oh, no wonder, no wonder I passed out, no wonder this happened, Cause nothing like that had ever happened before. And uh, I was like, oh man.
Speaker 2And.
Speaker 1I, I was feeling, I was feeling terrible for like three days. So yes, so that's the time when I roofied myself. Well, I hope that was entertaining.
Speaker 3You see, it's so interesting because, like I know, you always like, yeah, you need a few minutes to tell a story, but now we have proof. It's like okay, you took exactly 10 minutes to tell a story. We literally have documented proof. Now that that's how long it takes, and it could take longer.
Speaker 1Depending on the story. Yeah, it could take longer. As you see, I am drinking water along with this and I did eat before the show started. I ate about 30 minutes before we hit record.
Speaker 3It was a grilled cheese sandwich and I had a bite. It was pretty good. Yeah, uh, we hit record. It was a grilled cheese sandwich and I had a bite. It was pretty good.
Speaker 1Yeah, it actually really was good, so good, um, yeah, so I had food in my stomach. I'm drinking water. Um, people are checking in and out as the show is progressing. It's okay, you can stick around. Come on back. People and Timer. Oh, it's going off. It's going to go Okay. So let me prep the next drink and then we'll do the breathalyzer before I take it.
Speaker 2I'm just going to mark it off now.
Speaker 1That's fine.
Speaker 3And then let me get my notes. I love having a notebook. At my apartment we have a notebook and just all sketch in it like stuff throughout the week, or like we had a day where we just drew everyone like I was like, oh, this is summer so there's like three stick people in the notebook or like there's this guy who's our friend and he just like has a really big butt and I was trying to tell them I was like guys like this is like what he would look like.
Speaker 1No.
Speaker 3No, okay, warming up.
Speaker 1Five four three.
Speaker 3So this is after four shots.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 3One. Okay, wait, I'm going to guess. Okay, we're going to say 0.06. I'm going to guess.
Speaker 1We're going to say 0.06. 0.015. What so it did double. Though it doubled.
Speaker 3And now it says 59 minutes until sober. Okay, okay, 0.015.
Speaker 1Yeah, 0.015. 59 minutes until, okay, until your system, what is it? It said something like until your system is whatever, I don't know. I wasn't reading.
Speaker 3That's probably taking into account like, as if, like, your BAC is dropping, but I think yours is probably going to be on the rise, so that, like minutes until sober it's probably very inaccurate.
Speaker 1Yeah, and it. Well, let's put it this way. We know, even if I didn't take this drink and waited another five minutes, it's still. It's going to be higher because I'm still, I'm still taking it in.
Speaker 3So here we go down the hatch, get ready with your time. Yeah, um, thank you All right um, thank you all right. Okay, perfect, we'll reset that timer, all right okay and just so you have an idea we have. First shot was at 6, 10, yeah, after two shots at six. After so, 22 minutes, two shots in .007. Right After 45 minutes, four shots in .015.
Speaker 1It doubled yeah, I mean more than double if you count the 100th part of there. 1,000th Science yeah, 1000th um science, yeah, do you now me? Four shots in under an hour, five actually in under an hour. There's no way that I would get behind the wheel, even though I feel fine right now. I feel, I mean, can you tell any difference right now? If you honestly can tell the difference, here's what I'll tell you. Yeah, please.
Speaker 3The more you've been talking since you took that shot. If I were the officer, I'd be like I smell liquor, sir Well yeah, there's no amount of gum or like smell it.
Speaker 1Yeah, there's no amount of gum or mints that's going to get rid of this right now, but that's because it's tequila too.
Speaker 3You know you're taking shots, yeah.
Speaker 1You know it's like yeah.
Speaker 3But I would say maybe, like for me, because I know you. I feel like you look a bit more flushed right now. Do you feel like you're warmer?
Speaker 1Not just yet, but if I look a little pink pink, I noticed when I got home from work that my ears were red and my face, from my sunglasses down, was red, just from being outdoors and in the sun a little bit. So if it still looks like that, it probably has to do with work and not so much the alcohol. But one of my good friends is calling. One of my good friends is calling, let's see. Well, hello to you, sir. I'm doing okay, larry. How are you?
Speaker 2I'm watching your email. I'm sure I'm changing, oh.
Speaker 1So are you really seeing a difference? Really, listen to this guy.
Speaker 3You have another seven minutes left.
Speaker 1Yeah, but I'm just getting it ready. Listen to this guy here.
Speaker 2Well, I appreciate you watching, larry, because you know as I don't know if the rest of the audience knows, but there is a three-hour time difference between here and where you are in Batesville.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah earlier and, uh, I'm totally drinking the. Okay. Okay, let's not sound like a white guy saying that larry, it's on. Yeah, ho, look everybody. This is yeah, whatever test. This is larry. This is this is yeah, whatever Tess. This is Larry. This is the guy who was on his podcast almost two weeks ago. Actually, two weeks ago today. Yeah, go ahead.
Speaker 1It was published on a Sunday ahead. Oh, okay, well, um, yeah, it was a lot of fun, you and I and Tess Tess, this is so funny. Larry and I we went for two hours. We went for two hours, yes, and we just talked, and I was trying to explain to his audience that that's something that Larry and I do when the microphones aren't on. We just you know, he'll call him like he's calling tonight, or I call him just to check on him we just check on each other and see how we're doing and we just talk.
Speaker 1I mean, I don't think Larry and I have had a conversation under 30 minutes. Yeah, go ahead, larry. Just a couple of talkers, that's all. But you know what, larry, if you're going to, if you're going to host a podcast, I guess you better be able to talk a little bit, right? Oh, yeah, like I said before, I came out of my introverted shell when I was about two, about two, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. Well, listen, I just wanted to check in because your demeanor is slow, but sure, with change, I'm going to watch this till the end. I can hear a good one. Oh, geez, louise. Well, let's hope that it's not my head hitting the table, okay, hey, thanks for calling Larry. Take care now. All right, bye. Now, there he goes. There he goes, larry Reedy, he is so cool, he's just such a great guy, such a great guy and he's a generous guy. Man, he is just the stuff that he does around his community and he's just such a great guy, just give, give, give, never take, always give. That's Larry.
Speaker 3Okay, it's interesting hearing him say the demeanor thing. So at the concert yesterday my friends and I we didn't drink at all when we were there, um, because I don't know if people like heard the sing. But they say like if there's like a concert like you really like want to go to and like you really enjoy the band, like maybe don't get like absolutely wasted, because you'll just remember it more and enjoy it and of course we really and you know I don't want to be running the bathroom the whole time- or like, like that or holding anything.
Speaker 3We were free to dance and it was nice.
Speaker 1Right.
Speaker 3But there's a bar around the corner of the venue Good Times at Davey Wayne's.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 3And the concert ended and we didn't want to be standing outside in the cold. So we said let's run around the corner, We'll seek refuge in Davey Wayne's and we can just Uber from there.
Speaker 2But we went to Davey Waynes and it was just so interesting because remember, we're like completely sober.
Speaker 3You can just tell um like when people are talking to you. I'm just like.
Speaker 3I'm like oh my gosh, I'm scared of you. Like you're really, like you're really gone right now. And then we went to another place, um, after that, and you know, we were just, I felt like we were just so aware if everyone were like, oh, like that guy keeps turning around looking at us like he's like a weirdo, um, and then a guy actually came up to us and he's talking and I didn't even know what he was talking about. And then his friend came up and then you know, his friend were like, oh, he's like kind of cute.
Speaker 3And then he opened his mouth and he was just like all right, I hear a joke easy, medium or long and then he's telling the joke and he's like, uh, like literally falling over and we were just like and I said, oh, it's okay, like it's okay, but it was just like a really interesting experience and my friends never talking about it and it just made us wonder.
Speaker 3Oh, like, I wonder if, like, we were just hyper aware of all that because we were completely sober yeah, and if yeah, you know, if we saw them on a different day, if we'd be like entertaining it, like oh my gosh, like hi, like yeah and like you know, because we wouldn't be noticing either. So I don't know, it was just really interesting because it was just easy to be very aware of it, how like it was last night.
Speaker 1When you are completely sober yes, you, I mean you become aware of those who are not. Your antennas are up and you're watching all of their moves, you're listening to their speech pattern, you're paying attention to, to all the little things, maybe even more so than if you both were sober. Um, I'll tell you this right now I don't feel much of anything, and when I do get a buzz going, I feel it in my jaw. I feel it in my jaw. My jaw starts to kind of get a little numb. Right now, five shots in, it does not, but you know, we'll see what happens here. Number six is coming up About a minute left. I'm wondering, tess, I'm wondering if we should hit the breathalyzer one more time before we do the sixth yeah, you want to try it.
Speaker 3I think now we should just log them each.
Speaker 1Before every shot. Yeah, and see how it's excuse me how it's going up Okay.
Speaker 3I shouldn't have started the list right here, though, because now you have these words here.
Speaker 1Ah no, those are just little notes, Don't even worry about it.
Speaker 3Okay, yeah, it's funny. You write in like kind of like all caps.
Speaker 1Oh, I write in all caps. Is that just like a man thing? It's a. I don't write cursive like hardly ever anymore. That's what it is.
Speaker 3Okay.
Speaker 1And it's just. But it's funny. It's big caps and little caps.
Speaker 3Yeah it is. Like it's uppercase and lowercase and like the like it's uppercase and lowercase and like the, the like it has, like flair to it, like it's like Friday, like night live I don't know how to describe it. You know what I mean. It's like a like, a little like no, I don't know what you mean. No, like you know what. I mean like on a poster or something, and this is like fancy lettering or something. The way you like, do these letters.
Speaker 1Maybe that's because it's all caps and the-. Oh, it's time.
Speaker 3And like the upper caps and lower caps.
Speaker 1Yeah, I never really thought about that. Okay, so I guess what we'll do now that we've done two before we did it before drink number three and drink number five, we're going to measure the alcohol content before every drink, right?
Speaker 3Okay, and you're about an hour in from your first drink, right?
Speaker 1now we are. We're just over an hour. Okay, it's on, it's warming up. Four, three, two, one.
Speaker 3Do you find it getting progressively harder to blow into that thing?
Speaker 1No, Whoa what are we at? 0.026.
Speaker 3Oh, it doubled again basically.
Speaker 1Yes, one hour 44 minutes until sober is what it says. It says you are likely feeling a loss of shyness and-.
Speaker 3Well, you never have shyness.
Speaker 1Yeah, slight euphoria. Okay, yeah, I'm never gonna be sure, so all right no, shiny, still is there, wow so that's before the drink all right, I'll tally off number six larry, one of these times, you and, oh my gosh.
Speaker 1But, larry, you're okay, you and I. Well, no, no, no, I'm sorry, larry, I don't want to kill you. I would say we should go shot for shot. Do our own drunk show. Go shot for shot. But do our own drunk show go shot for shot. But no, no, I would, that would no, sorry, I don't want to do that. But and and I know you can't, I know you don't have the sorry about that test I know you don't have the video component. We'd have to figure that one out. We're going to have to, we're going to have to get you on starlink so that, um, we can get you, uh, we can get you video, um, you know all that good stuff. So, uh, where were we? Oh, all right. So one more, one more, um, one more drunk story. Uh, this was, this was in 2020. Glasses on.
Speaker 3Just taking notes.
Speaker 1This was in 2020. This was, of course, when the world shut down and um, you know, as, as you guys know, my radio heroes are Mark and Brian, and Mark and Brian would do a drunk show every year, uh, for St Patrick's day, uh, kind of like what we're doing now.
Speaker 3So my I was here for this story.
Speaker 1Yes, you were my. My idea for this is not the most original. Okay, I, I I took a cue from Mark and Brian and I was always working, always working on those days when they were doing their drunk show. So I always thought, man, that'd be cool if I could just be at home and go shot for shot with these guys and see if I end up like they end up. And they never passed out on the show. They did like one shot about every 15 minutes.
Speaker 1So there's some archived Mark and Brian shows. I don't even remember the website, but I looked one up and the and a drunk show was there. So I get my iPad out, just like it is right here on the table and I'm and I'm, I'm, I'm playing it and I'm listening to it Me here. I think I'm all cool, I'm prepared. I barely ate anything like an idiot. I think I had like two slices of toast or something and, um, I had a not a monster, like a rock star energy drink, not that monster at one time used to have uh, it was like gatorade with caffeine.
Speaker 3It was called monster hydro orange ones though that orange and green and I remember they don't have those anymore. No, he loved those things.
Field Sobriety Test & Final Readings
Speaker 1It was like Gatorade with caffeine. It was awesome and it didn't have all that other crap in there like the Monster and Rockstar energy drinks and all that stuff, Red Bulls and all that crap, Anyway. So I'm sitting at the dining room table and I'm trying to match them shot. I'm listening and I'm trying to match them shot for shot and I don't remember much after I got on the iPad and I started FaceTiming. Family and friends Now Tess and Catherine were there watching this.
Speaker 3This was during lockdown, right right, yeah, this was on everything, yeah.
Speaker 1This was during lockdown, right, right? Yeah, this was a Saturday. I picked a Saturday and I don't remember really any of this. I know it was in the afternoon, but I was about 14 shots in and I was doing a FaceTime with like three different family members and somebody told me they told me later I mean Tess and, like I said, catherine were there and they said I'm talking and the next thing I know they know is that my head hits the table, boom, slams into the table and I'm out. The next thing. I know I think this is around two o'clock in the afternoon. I will tell you this right now Timeout, timeout. Tell you this right now I'm starting to feel a little not like wobbly or anything, but like very relaxed right now. Okay, I'm starting to feel that right now.
Speaker 3It's like the pupils.
Speaker 1Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2Hmm.
Speaker 1Hmm, and so are you going to record some more notes. So my head hits the table, His head hit the table. Boom. The next thing I know, I wake up and I'm laying on my. I'm laying, you know, face down like this on the couch in the living room and there's a. There's a I don't know if it was a bowl or a pan.
Speaker 3It was a bowl.
Speaker 1Right next to me and I woke up and I don't even know what time it was, but Catherine and Tess are sitting in the living room or in the dining room. They're right there where I was just kind of like, okay, whatever, and they had the television on, they're just watching it. And then I wake up and I'm like I can barely hold my head up and I yak into the bowl and I'm like, oh, okay, what happened?
Speaker 3You passed out. So what happened was yeah, I mean we've told you, but okay. So where he forgets is okay. Your head hit the table and that's like the last thing you remember until you were on the couch yeah, so after that.
Speaker 3I think that was probably when my mom and I we went over to you and I don't remember if we both helped you or if she just helped you and I got the bowl or what, but I think we like carried you over to the couch. I think you're on the couch and then you fell. You were on the floor at one point. Wait, did we put you on the floor at first?
Speaker 3I, I don't know because you were like on the floor. Maybe you fell off the couch, but we tried to get you on the couch okay and yeah. Then you yacked in the bowl, yeah, and we were just like hanging out yeah, just kind of observing laughing probably. You went to bed probably after that, right yeah, I was fine the next day.
Speaker 1I was fine the next day, but yeah, but. But what's funny is katherine kept telling me afterwards. She said why did you keep drinking? You kept saying, oh, I missed a shot. I missed a shot, so I don't know how many. She says they didn't even take a drink. And you're taking drinks. What's wrong with you? So I don't know what was going on. I have no clue.
Speaker 3I remember I think I have a video of it, but you, um, you finished, what was it? Like Toro, like that tequila, is that what it was-huh? Toro, yeah, that okay. So you had one of those and I think it was already open, okay, and you finished that bottle and then I remember you had to go get a new bottle another one and you didn't know how to like uncork it, and I remember you were there with like a knife and you're on facetime with someone.
Speaker 3You're like I don't know what I'm doing, like oh no, you're like trying to get it open with the knife. We're just like.
Speaker 1I think this is the first time I'm hearing this. I literally have a video of this oh no, oh no, gonna end up on my Instagram page or uh.
Speaker 3You know it'll be a short on YouTube or something like that well, I don't know if you remember, but then also I had you do that TikTok.
Speaker 3He was wearing a purple bandana yes, in this yeah, and if you guys are fans of the office. There's like an up. He does like a bit purple bandana and I throughout the time ben was doing it I was like, oh my gosh, ben like just like, do these like motions and stuff, and it was funny at the time oh, so, so you were, you were, you were taking advantage of my. It's not viewable anymore, don't worry.
Speaker 1Yeah, you were taking advantage of my looseness and my euphoria and making me do things that I probably didn't even know I was doing right, yep, yeah, all right, we're six shots in right. Yeah, because we took.
Speaker 3Timer. Yeah, you have two minutes on the timer.
Speaker 1Well, we'll get the next one ready.
Speaker 3Well, yeah, yeah, that was your sixth shot.
Speaker 1Yeah, we'll get the next one ready.
Speaker 3And then we'll have you blow and then I'll log what it is for the sixth shot.
Speaker 1Okay, yeah, let's see how quickly it goes up in 10 minutes.
Speaker 3It might double again, because look, I mean it's showing that it's been doubling, it's doubled. Each time, huh, each time we've measured it yeah and go ahead sorry, no go ahead well I maybe you'll be under 0.5, or you'll be like at 0.5 if it's still doubling, okay, or 0.05, my bad yeah 0.5 means you beat yeah 0.5 would be um so geez.
Speaker 1And how much time do we have?
Speaker 3Another minute and a half.
Speaker 1Okay, all right, well, I won't start this. I'll wait till after the next shot before I start this next.
Speaker 3Well, in the meantime, I'm going to find the video. I have the date it was April 4th, so definitely, oh, ben, this is the video. This is the video.
Speaker 1Oh, no you know I'm trying to oh that's, oh, that is you should. Okay, oh my gosh, I took channel locks. Hold that up to the camera. Hold that up to the camera. I'm not shy. Let's see if they can see it.
Speaker 3You know I'm trying to eye. Let's see if they can see it yeah it's bad. Well, you get the idea.
Speaker 1Yeah, you can hear it anyway, holy cow.
Speaker 3Yeah, this wasn't like anyway, Holy cow. Yeah, this was when we just put it there, like you can't even see it.
Speaker 1Yeah, it's too much light. Yeah, the studio light.
Speaker 3Oh, you can't even see it but he was just sitting at the table all by himself.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 3Drinking away the day.
Speaker 1Well, we'll wait till after. Well, we'll do the breathalyzer. Okay, we'll take the shot. Then I'm going to get into this thing here. I've been wanting to get into for a couple of weeks. We're going to talk a little bit of music.
Speaker 3Here are the ducks.
Speaker 1There are the ducks. Oh, breathalyzer first, yeah breathalyzer first. Okay, breathalyzer first. You are on up five four three, two one blue okay, calculating whoa what is it?
Speaker 3no, let me guess okay, is it at? 0.06. Now no, is it 0.05? No, what?
Speaker 1is it no?
Speaker 3let me guess. Okay, is it at 0.06, now no, is it 0.05?
Speaker 1No, what is it? Almost Okay. Three hours and 12 minutes until sober. You are likely experiencing lower inhibitions. Oh, I was going to get into this and impaired reasoning. I was going to get it 0.048 dang, that's before. Uh, is this shot six or seven?
Speaker 3uh six, oh no you've got five well, now it's seven, seven, yeah so that's after six.
Speaker 1That's after this is your seventh. Yeah, this would be seven, and it was .048.
Speaker 1.048. Okay, .048. And yes, did you hear what I was reading? I'm experiencing what was it? Something and loss of reasoning or something along those lines. Before I take this Sorry, yes, I am, the jaw is not quite numb, but it's starting to get there, but I can feel I'm really starting to feel this now. Okay, I'm really starting to feel it, as I said, like after four drinks I was not going to get behind a wheel. No, not at all. And and and for me. Well, let me take it. Wait. Oh, sorry, oh whiskey's meowing outside.
Speaker 3Whiskey wants to come in. Whiskey should be the mascot of this podcast. Okay, oh, I can't. Okay, oh.
Speaker 1I know myself. And here's the thing, remember it said something like you know you start to lose your inhibitions. That is the thing you cannot allow to happen, because that is exactly what happens as you consume more and more alcohol. So, whether you're out at a club, you're out at a bar, you're at a party, whatever it might be, you have to be cognizant of that. And it's so funny that this thing is telling me exactly what I'm feeling, other than the shyness, cause I'm never shy about anything. Um, well, I'm kind of a little bit, but not much. So, um, you do start to lose your inhibitions and it's so, so important to realize that, to recognize that and not make bad decisions. Honestly, especially for ladies, excuse me, you get a few drinks in you and you start to get a little loosey-goosey. Guys look for that stuff. They look for that stuff. They want to see the girl who's a little loosey-goosey and so they can get in a score that night. Okay, you really, really need to be cognizant of that. Ladies, I'm looking out for you.
Speaker 1Honestly, as a father, I don't want to see that happen to Tess. I don't want to see that happen to any of you out there. That's not has nothing to do with the alcohol Cause I do that. I do that quite often where I knock over the microphone and that's not on drinking shows, where I knock over the microphone and that's not on drinking shows. But I will say this in doing that I can tell that. I don't want to say my vision is impaired, but how do I describe it? The vision is impaired. Nothing's blurry, but waving my hand like that, I can tell my hand. Movement seems a little slower, at least in my eye, in my, in my vision.
Speaker 3Cause there's an overall looseness.
Speaker 1It seems a little slower. It seems like my body is moving a little slower. These are things that are happening, ladies. Be cognizant of this. This is what is going to happen to you. And remember, I'm 200, right now, today, I'm 202.6 pounds. I promise you, most of you ladies out there are not 202.6 pounds and most of you are not six feet tall. Okay, it's going to happen to you a lot quicker. Just be aware of that. Know that this is going to happen to you. Okay, go and have fun, have a good time, but don't get like this. And I'm what.
Speaker 1Seven drinks in now, seven, okay, now you may not have seven drinks in an hour and a half or an hour and 20 minutes, whatever it is. What are we at Seven? 23? Okay, so we're almost an hour and a half. We're not quite an hour and 20 minutes, whatever it is. What are we at? 723? Okay, so we're almost an hour and a half. We're not quite an hour and a half in, but you may not have that many. Most of you ladies are probably not going to drink beer. You're probably going to drink a mixed cocktail, so you are going to end up having a higher alcohol content. Just be aware of what's going on. Okay, protect yourselves.
Speaker 3And on that note, protect each other.
Speaker 1Come up a little closer, listen to her. Listen to her.
Speaker 3Because I feel like a lot of times I mean, some of my guy friends have asked me this my coworker, he said to me a few weeks ago I was talking about one of my nights out with my friends and he said, yeah, all right, on a typical night out, you know, do you guys like go home? Or let me rephrase that, not you guys, but yeah, yeah, I get you like do you girls like do people split off?
Speaker 3and like do does someone in the group go home with the guy, like does that happen a lot? And I said honestly, no, we never do that.
Speaker 1Smart, smart, smart.
Speaker 3And I feel like if you go out with your girls, I don't know, it's just always safer. You know, there's no rush in that regard, and I feel like that's like the best thing you can do for your friends, especially if you know if do for your friends, if, especially if you know if one of your friends is kind of a bit like loose at that point and is like, oh, like I'm just gonna stay here with him, then that's, you know, probably not a good idea and you know if you're able to, you know, find some way like oh no, our Uber's here, we got to go Then that's the best thing you can do for your friend in that moment, because then, I don't know, it's just you need to stay together on a girl's night.
Speaker 1No, yeah, no, you absolutely do. And again, in losing your inhibitions, it can tend to sorry, I don't mean to make it sound like this promiscuous, okay, sort of. You know, it's not what you want, ladies, it's not what you want, okay, but there's so many guys out there 20, 30, 40, 50-year-old guys, it doesn't matter, okay, guys are all the same, they're all dogs. Who's that? Who's somebody? Somebody left a comment, somebody k? I can't. First off, I'm a little impaired now so I can't see if it says k, but it looks like a hand clap. Is it a hand clap, key? He?
Speaker 3said cheers cheers.
Speaker 1Okay, he didn't say cheers.
Speaker 3But he's for my part but but he put the beer glasses.
Speaker 1Oh, okay, cheers. Oh, I thought it was somebody hand clapping, like for what you said. It said it's cheers.
Speaker 3No, like he said yeah, cheers.
Speaker 1Okay, well, cheers to you. This isn't the right time for it, but okay, what was that? There was another one, one from key now he said just one beer mug. Oh okay, gotcha, I'm getting the next one um prepared.
Speaker 3I don't know how much time we have like the logo for stream yards and duck it is.
Speaker 1Oh, we have duck sounds yeah. Yeah, that's right, we have duck sounds yeah look at intuition, it's just oh, you're just awesome.
Speaker 3My intuition really is off the charts, though, guys.
Speaker 1But I can tell you look, I am really.
Speaker 3Toasted.
Speaker 1No, no, no, I'm not. I am really really feeling this. I really am. I am really getting loose here. Look, honest, Look, I'm not so proud to where I'm going to try to to tell you something that isn't true. Okay, I am, I'm getting, I'm, I'm, I'm really really feeling this after 90 minutes. So, um, how much time do we have for the?
Speaker 330 seconds.
Speaker 1Oh, okay, all right, so we'll do a breathalyzer, take the shot and then look, I'm getting into this. I'm tired of waiting on this.
Speaker 3If you want, you can do the breathalyzer right now. I'll reset the timer and you'll probably take that by the time this is up.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 3So it's going to be 728.
Speaker 1Yeah, breathalyzer's on, it's warming up. Five, four, three, two, one Blue.
Speaker 3Perfect timing.
Speaker 1Perfect timing, yeah, and this is okay. This is before shot number eight. Four hours and 51 minutes until sober. Your balance, speech, vision and reaction time may be impaired. Look at that, I'm not even going to say it. You say it 0.073. Yeah, 0.073. And I'll tell you what I feel. Like it, I do, I feel like it.
Speaker 3Okay, so it's increasing quicker now. So you went from increasing so it was 0.007 and then it went to 0.015. Okay, yeah, and then it nearly doubled. It went up. I'm just going to count these as points, like we're going to say it went up. What is this? 11 points.
Speaker 1Right.
Speaker 3And then it went up 22 points.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 3And now it's gone up 25 points.
Speaker 1It's like doubling and now almost tripling.
Speaker 3It's accelerating.
Speaker 1Yeah, it is. It's tremendously accelerating and this is within 90 minutes and, of course, most of you Okay, is it the?
Speaker 1I see Hell yeah is it the car I see? Hell, yeah, um, but um, yeah, most of you aren't gonna get loaded in 90 minutes. I, I know that, I know that, but I, I can't keep you here for three, four hours, and if you have two drinks an hour for four hours, you're going to be the same situation I'm in and most of the time you're out, a minimum of four hours, am I right, tess?
Speaker 2Yeah, you can be yeah.
Speaker 1I mean you're going to go out for four hours, sometimes longer. So this is number eight, right're. I mean you're going to go out for four hours, sometimes longer.
Speaker 3So this is what number eight. Right, Yep, I'm setting the timer.
Speaker 1All right, number eight, I think. I think when we do the next shot, which will be nine, I think that's when we'll go downstairs, we'll go out outside on the patio and try a field sobriety test. Oh yes, sorry, I'm used to being here by myself. Let me send you yeah, let me send you an email.
Speaker 3Just can't get away from these emails.
Speaker 1Yeah, boom.
Speaker 2Okay, see email.
Speaker 1How am I sending oh?
Speaker 3do you want me to do it?
Speaker 1Yeah, here, take the keyboard, it's. Let me turn it on first.
Speaker 3I can literally just go type it right there and send it to myself here. Oh okay, what if I make a typo? I'll tell you in a second there it is you're there, oops, did I make a typo?
Speaker 1oh, oh, that's me yeah, you're there, and then let's go down to there and let's hang on paste come on. And let's hang on Paste, come on Paste, sorry Boom, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Don't do that, don't do that, don't do that.
Speaker 3Well, I spaced it. It's the link to the phone.
Speaker 1Hang on, okay, good, and let me send it. Oh, that's what you wanted to do. She's Louise. Okay, let's see if you get it. Let's see if you get it. Okay. So I sent Tess a link to her email so that she can. Actually, she would almost like join us in studio. Well, she will. Okay. All right, hold on. I felt it right there the slur in my speech. I felt it right there.
Speaker 3It looks like he's so drunk. Look at this message.
Speaker 1I can barely see it, honestly. Okay. So I'm almost right now. I'm almost okay. Remember, I told you about the jaw that it would start getting a little bit numb. Yeah, it's getting there. It's getting there, okay. Here's what I want to share. I want to share a little bit of music news with you, because I mean, we do talk a lot of music on this show, the outfield. Everyone knows the outfield and I want to do this before I get wasted, okay, before I'm just I can't speak anymore. I love this band. I mean, they're so, so, so good. I want to talk about their first two albums. They're right here. I have them right here on the shelf, ready to go.
Speaker 3What are you doing? Well, lauren was saying, they're watching.
Speaker 1Oh, okay, the first album, the debut album Play Deep, and the second album, the debut album Play Deep and the second album, banging. Okay, that's what I want to talk about, those two albums. If you are not familiar with the outfield, please make yourself. Man, it is getting hot in here. It is getting hot in here. It is getting hot in here, but make yourselves familiar with the Outfield so good. Their debut album, play Deep, came out in 1985. I think it was like the summer of 85. Let me look. Let me look at my notes here. I don't even know how am I supposed to look at my notes. I can barely see right now. Jeez, louise, yep, I was, I was right. August 12, 1985 is when the debut album was released. It contained great. The first single was say it isn't. The second single was your Love. Remember Josie's on a vacation far away. Yeah, even you know it. Come around and talk it over. You want to sing it. So many things that I want to say.
Speaker 3I know the lines like I want to make my girls a little bit older.
Speaker 1I just want to use your love tonight. I don't want to lose your love tonight. Oh, so good. My favorite song on that is probably Say it Isn't so. Look Keys coming in tonight. Yes, yes, what's that song? The phone number one? Oh, that's from Tommy Two-Tone. So look at keys coming in tonight. Yes, yes, what's that song? The like. The phone number one? Oh, that's, that's from Tommy. Two tone. That's eight, six, seven, eight, six, seven, five, three, oh, nine. What's the phone number?
Speaker 3Like the girl's name or something Jenny, jenny.
Speaker 1It's good, yeah, it's good, yeah. The. The. The full title of the song is eight, six, seven, five, three, oh, nine, jenny, all right, let's get back to the outfield. First we can talk. No, no, we can talk, tommy, two tone in a minute.
Speaker 1So, um, the debut album, play D, comes out in 1985. It's dynamite album. First song that's released is Say it Isn't so. Okay, it does okay on the top on the Billboard Top 40. The big hit for them is your Love, which is one Tess and I were singing and it's a great song. I honestly, I honestly think Say it Isn't so is an even better song, but nonetheless, the. I think they released a third single. That was All the Love In the World, great, great harmonies, great vocals from, um, uh, tony Lewis, who was the bass player and lead singer. John Spinks was the lead guitarist, background vocals. There's a couple of songs, there's a few songs in the catalog where John takes the lead. But John, john Spinks wrote everything. He was the chief songwriter, everything. He was the. The chief songwriter wrote everything for the band. So, honestly, and I'm starting to burp a little bit, okay, so really, really, really now starting to feel the effects of this stuff. Okay, tess. Tess is listening to your love on her phone. Well, the really popular EDM DJ.
Speaker 3he did a remix to it, so I was like what?
Speaker 1Well, that is their absolutely most popular song. It has over a billion streams on Spotify. Yeah, yeah, your Love is their most popular song. I don't think it's their best. It's a great song. Tonight you won't pick it up, though, unfortunately, I want to lose your love tonight, tony spinks, that's becoming a thing like these edm djs.
Speaker 3They're remixing classic songs oh, yeah, yeah awesome because, like on the dance floor, like you know, like from my generation at least like to seamlessly blend those songs, getting people to like I don't know groove to seamlessly blend those songs, getting people to like I don't know groove to you know older songs Cool.
Speaker 1I'm going to tell you what look that song my girl. There's a really good one oh you mean my girl, my the temptations, my girl.
Speaker 3Oh, that's what a beautiful song.
Speaker 1Yes, On a cloudy day. On a cloudy day, yeah, no, that's a great song, but oh no, oh ready. Are you kidding me? Come on, are you watching this, larry? This is insane.
Speaker 3Ben, do you have a large record collection?
Speaker 1I don't, I used to. I don't, no, actually see everything that's right here. That's all I have in vinyl anymore. I told the story. I told the story on Larry's podcast last week when I was on that. This is number nine, right?
Speaker 3and I will log 739.
Speaker 1I was telling Larry that when I was 18 years old, um, I sold, I sold all, almost all of my vinyl. Yeah, I had, I mean just you know, for for somebody who you're talking started buying records in about 75, somewhere right around there to 1983, you know, six, seven, eight year period. That's a. I mean I had a ton of vinyl and I sold almost all of it, including all my Kiss albums, all my Beatles albums, whatever Aerosmith I had. Yeah, oh, I sold all of it. I got a whole sum of $85 for it in 1983. I would say probably the most collectible album that I had at the time was the Beatles' Let it Be, which was the original pressing came on a gatefold album cover, which means it opened up, you know, and it was on the Apple label, which was the Beatles label after Capitol records.
Speaker 1And, um, yeah, you can't. You know, the, the, the, uh, uh. Subsequent pressings of that were not gatefold. I don't know if they were on Apple, because I never bought one, but yeah. So anyway, yeah, I got a whole $85. And so I've been trying to make up for it a little bit. You know, I go on eBay from time to time and try to buy stuff that, like with my Kiss albums, kiss had several different labels, not label brands.
Speaker 2Oh, let me drink this, let me drink this oh no, no, no, no, we got to measure.
Speaker 1We got to measure first. Okay, let's turn this on Warming up.
Speaker 3Five four, three, two, one, five four three two one I'm gonna guess you're 0.91, maybe 0.92 in a second or 0.092 let me show you that right there 0.09 on the dot
Speaker 10.09. It says six hours. Six hours and zero minutes. Until I'm sober, your balance, speech, vision and reaction time may be impaired. No, I think it's definitely going to be impaired. I think it's definitely going to be impaired. No, I think it's probably. I think it's definitely going to be impaired. I think it's definitely impaired. I can tell right now. My vision is is I mean, yeah, I can see, but everything is just like I feel it. I feel it. This is number nine. So, before we do the next one, we're going to go down and we're going to do a field sobriety test, but I'm going to finish up some more on the uh on the outfield.
Speaker 3Do you want me to set a timer? Okay, yeah. Honestly, Ben, I have to applaud you a bit for just taking these well, like I said, I'm six foot no, I mean the taste, like, just like, oh well, this is delicious tequila.
Speaker 1This, oh good. This is easy to drink. Easy to drink. But this many drinks in for somebody who is even 30 pounds lighter than me. Forget it. I guarantee you're on the floor. I can tell right now my reaction time is much slower. I just started. What happened here? What does that say, Tess? What does that comment say from Key?
Speaker 3What you drinking.
Speaker 1Oh, key, we're drinking. Well, we aren't. What I'm drinking, key is Cava C-A-V-A, d-e, oro, o-r-o. I think it's like cave of gold. Cave of gold, yeah, cave of gold. Cava de Oro. It's an extra añejo, so it's got extra age. This is aged and I could just feel it right now in my speech. I could feel that I was like slurring a little bit, maybe a lot of it, and and um, but this is aged three to five years, okay, so that's what that is.
Final Messages & Show Wrap
Speaker 1So that's what. That's what I'm drinking tonight. It is an absolutely delicious tequila. I don't know if this is the first time that you've watched this uh podcast key, but, uh, I've done some tequila. I've done a tequila tasting in the past and and and and and tasted this one as well. But yeah, no, it's a fabulous tequila. It really really is, and I'll be honest with you, I am not doing this tequila any justice by pounding it every 10 minutes like I am. This is such a beautiful tequila. You pour yourself a you know four ounce drink and you could take an hour to go down with that thing and, uh, man, just, oh, beautiful, it's a beautiful tequila, it's beautiful, uh, anyway. So we were talking about the outfield, right, okay, uh, play deep. What a great album. And it was huge. It was huge. It came out of the gates. Uh, big mtv, uh videos with say it isn't so just, oh my gosh, such a good song such a good song, such a good song.
Speaker 1Then, of course, all your Love, and then All the Love in the World. What is Key saying right there? Honestly, I can't even see.
Speaker 3My head's all wobbly right now too. Pantolones is oh, he said you try lagavulin. And then he said pantalones is an underrated tequila.
Speaker 1It's matthew mcconaughey's I never even heard of that. But I I never heard of that, but I will look into it. I'll write a note for you yeah write a note.
Speaker 1Write a note, pantalones. The problem with celebrities who who get into into any kind of any kind of liquor, you know, um, doesn't matter what it rum, tequila, um, whatever it might be is a lot of times they're just putting their name on it. Okay, they have some ownership in it and they're throwing their name on it and they make money, and who I mean? Of course, they probably know how it takes tests. I'm letting you know right now, man, my movements. They feel, and now I know right now I'm going slow motion, but they feel really, really slow. They feel really slow right now.
Speaker 3I know, if we put on a beat, you'd be like ooh.
Speaker 1I'm going to tell you right now, tess, if I tried to drive, forget about it. Okay, not just drive. If I tried to do a lot of things, many, many things. Cover your ears, darling. Please cover your ears. If I even tried to have hibbity dibbity with my wife, forget about it.
Speaker 3I was going to say something like make a sandwich, but all right it.
Speaker 2I was gonna say something like make a sandwich, but all right tess, I I'm not sure where.
Speaker 1It's funny because we said, before the next shot we will do the breathalyzer, yeah, and then we'll go downstairs. Before the next shot, we'll go downstairs and, and you can do your fst with me, okay, and we'll see how that goes. Um, that's gonna be interesting because, I'm gonna tell you right now. I'm gonna tell you, man, I am just like anyway, look, I want to get back to the outfield because this is four minutes, all the time where you gotta wrap this okay the outfield is so, so good Great vocals, great harmonies.
Speaker 1John Spinks is a was was. I'm going to tell you the outfield is no more. The outfield will be no more because, unfortunately, uh, John Spinks passed away. I don't even want to look at notes. John Spinks passed away around 2014, 13, 14, somewhere around there. He had, I think, liver cancer. Tony Spinks died 2019, 2020, 2021, somewhere right around there. I don't recall exactly and I apologize for that.
Speaker 1Um, I like to be exact on stuff, but this is the drunk show, so you know, um, and it's never, ever, ever been disclosed as to what tony spinks passed from Great, great voice. I had the opportunity to see the Outfield live one time and that was in 1989. They were on tour for their album it was the third album Voices of Babylon. They were opening for Mike and the Mechanics. I saw them at the Greek Theater, sat front row in the orchestra pit. I mean I could read the label on their tennis shoes. It was awesome. They sounded so good, so good. They sounded so good, so good. But I'm going to tell you this album right here. Let me, I'm sorry, this album here Play Deep, tremendous album, great album. I think it's a. I think, as you know, look, you look up stuff on Wikipedia and it's not necessarily current. Most of the stuff is current, but but when it comes to like, album sales, um, that type of stuff, it's not necessarily current because it depends on when the last time the catalog was, uh, certified, um, but I think this is like a triple platinum album Great stuff.
Speaker 11987, they release Bangin', the follow-up to Play Deep. It's unfortunate that I am actually talking about the outfield, whom I absolutely love so much, while I'm inebriated, it's it's, it really is. It's unfortunate. I see tess right there. She's like writing stuff down. I don't know, she might be drawn, she might be drawing pictures, who knows? But but the follow-up in 1987 was banging okay. Unfortunately it didn't do quite as well as um play deep, their debut album, but it is every bit as good. Every bit as good as play deep. It is so, so good.
Speaker 1They had one had one hit song off of it. That was Since You've Been Gone. What's funny is there's 10 tracks on the album and it's the last track. It's track number 10 on the album and that was the hit song. You never see that anywhere from any band at all. That track number 10 is the hit is the song or that they uh released to radio great, great stuff. Banging is such a good album, so so good. I wanted to talk to you guys about these two albums. I know, gosh, gosh. I'm really really starting to feel this. I'm really starting to feel this. So how much time do we have before the next?
Speaker 2one 10 seconds. 10 seconds okay.
Speaker 1All right, let me put these albums down so I don't damage them. Okay, so open up your email link please, tess, because what we're going to do, we're going to blow on the breathalyzer, then Tess is going to follow me out, she's going to open up her camera. Whoops, hang on. What happened here? There we go. Okay, tess is going to open up her camera and she's going to follow me downstairs, out to the patio, and she's going to conduct a field sobriety test.
Speaker 1I know, I know I'm slurring my speech. I feel it. I feel it. I'm looking at the camera, I'm looking at my computer. Everything is just like whoa, it really is honestly. Thing is just like whoa, it really is honestly. And what do we? Almost two hours into this, we're going to let you go soon, but, um, you know we're going to get this stuff. What do we? Where are we at before? Uh, sorry, now wait a minute. Okay, that one actually was a little reckless. That one probably was due to the alcohol content. Not normally, like I do if I get clumsy and sometimes I do get clumsy in here- that was because I am Okay, it's about time to breathalyze.
Speaker 1Okay, breath, I am way inebriated. Wait, wait, I could tell I didn't even finish that word. I am way inebriated. Okay, alright, this is on, it's warming up, I can't even hold it. Three, two, one, okay, okay, let's see. It's calculating here this is after this is after nine right right yeah, 0.11. Wow, okay, legally. Well, I was legally drunk the last time, right? Because I was at 0.09, right, uh-huh, seven hours and eight minutes. Okay, significant impairment of your motor coordination.
Speaker 3I'll tell you in a second of your motor coordination.
Speaker 1I'll tell you in a second 0.107. 0.107., yeah, 0.107.
Speaker 3That's after nine drinks right, you went up 17 points there, yeah okay, we're not going to pour the 10th one yet.
Speaker 1We're not going to pour the 10th one yet. We're not going to pour the 10th one yet. That's after nine shots. Okay, open up that email link so you can get your camera going.
Speaker 2Okay.
Speaker 1You got it.
Speaker 3Yeah, oh, I got to let you in the I got to let you in the studio.
Speaker 1Yeah, I don't see. Oh, I got to let you in the, I got to let you in the studio.
Speaker 2So let's see here, this is awesome.
Speaker 1This is awesome, tess. No, I don't see you. You'll, you'll, you'll see yourself pop up at the bottom of the screen Whenever you come in. How are you doing? Oh there you are. Okay, yeah, I know Hear the echo. All right, that's all right. That's all right, we're going to get out of here. We're going to get out of here real quick. Okay, let's go downstairs, follow me downstairs. I'm going to tell you right now Whoa, this is the first time I'm standing up.
Speaker 3Oh Wait, how do I flip the camera?
Speaker 1Wait, wait, hang on, there you are, that's all right.
Speaker 3Just use that. No, I can't flip the camera though.
Speaker 1Why do you want to flip the camera?
Speaker 3So I can show you.
Speaker 1Wait, wait, wait, hang on. What happened to my camera? You turned your camera off. No, no, no, I didn't turn my camera off, all right, hang on. No, no, no, hang on. Let me cry, let me uh. What happened here? I don't know hold on close out really quick. Sorry for those of you who are watching.
Speaker 3Sorry, uh, something happened here, do you want me to try it, then I I I'll be honest with you.
Speaker 1I can't see a darn thing. Um, ah, there we go. Okay, we're back in and let's get to back to the settings. That's a FaceTime, let's go to. Oh, what happened here? Hold on.
Speaker 3Oh, so they can't see us.
Speaker 1No, they can, they can. They're saying they're watching us. Good thing it's a drunk show, because you understand what's going on there. We go Okay, okay, okay. Go ahead and click on your link again. It says I'm backstage and not only you can see me. Okay, all right, let me put you in there. You go, all right, you there. Yeah, you put you in there. You go all right, you there. Yeah, you're there.
Speaker 3Okay, all right, tess is gonna follow me downstairs. I'm just trying to figure out, ben, how I can like flip the camera. I mean, I'm just gonna have to like do this yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fine, just do that.
Speaker 1Just do that, that's fine, and tess is gonna follow me downstairs and she we're gonna go outside onto the patio and Tess is going to conduct a field sobriety test and we're going to go from there and see how this plays out. Okay, now remember, this is what? Nine shots. I haven't even had the 10th shot yet. I haven't even had the 10th shot yet. And what are we at point? What? What are we? One?
Speaker 1point one oh, seven, point.107. So here tell you what we're going to take the field sobriety. We're going to come back up, we're going to blow into the breathalyzer one more time and see what it measures before we take a 10th shot How's that? And we'll see what happens. Okay, because that's going to be like another five or six, seven minutes. Okay, all right, let's do this, all right. Okay, so here we go.
Speaker 3Show's hitting the road. The show's hitting the road.
Speaker 1I'm going to tell you yeah, the show is hitting the road and Bannon right now is like whoa, not, here we go okay, well, put the camera on there, you go. Yeah, at least, like you know, it is cold outside, it's very cold outside. It's probably 50 degrees outside. Alright, tess is going to be a big friend baby. What do you mean? What do I mean? We're going to be up there for a second.
Speaker 3You hear, oh, look, ben, I'm wearing green. Oh, you want to wear it. See, it's a Jimmy.
Speaker 2Hendrix, see, you are ready, you here. Oh, look Ben.
Speaker 3I'm wearing green Look.
Speaker 2Oh, you wanna wear it See.
Speaker 3With the sweatshirt though.
Speaker 1Yeah, it's a Jimi Hendrix. See, you are red, you are Okay.
Speaker 3Whoa, I've worn this before, and Ben said I look homeless in this sweatshirt. Well, you do In this exact outfit.
Speaker 1I think I was wearing this Was it might have been. Hold on, show them to me. Hold on, okay, jimi Hendrix Swagfoot, look at that, does she not look?
Speaker 3homeless or what? All right, let's go. Okay, hold on to the stairs. I'm definitely holding on, let me. Just let me go down, okay you go down first.
Speaker 2Okay, I'm holding on to the stairs, which look that has nothing to do with the alcohol content, because even in the morning, when I'm going down the stairs, I'm going to produce a video. Yes, I am. Let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's. Right now, there's no way, no way possible that you should be operating a motor vehicle like I am First off. That's a long time ago. All right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, um, a lot older, uh, yeah, okay, three, four, five, feel it, thank you, okay, I'm trying to get it in this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Silence, silence, silence, silence, silence, silence, thank you. That was horrible, because it was still my leg that was bruised the entire time. That was terrible, but I know right now. Yeah, you know why. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Thank you, you, um, there's whiskey.
Speaker 1What's up W Shut off the light Right now. I can't get on the floor Right now. I feel like I would try to use everything I could to hold myself up. Okay, Good thing there's a handrail right here going up the stairs, everything I could to hold myself back, okay, okay.
Speaker 3Good thing there's a handrail right here going up the stairs, ben you're going to be so mad at me for what I'm going to tell you right now. Tell me, we were muted. What?
Speaker 1We were muted.
Speaker 3I'm talking and we were muted. Wait, if you watch this back, we're going to be muted.
Speaker 2Oh my gosh, we're going to be muted people.
Speaker 3Anyway, Honestly, that might make it funnier. Just you quietly doing these things. Whatever you sound like your mom, you sound like your daughter, that's just you. Oh my gosh, whatever, shut up, shut up, shut up. Okay, she always says that, whatever.
Speaker 1Good thing there's a handrail here.
Speaker 3Okay, oh, he's going to scare Whiskey.
Speaker 1Yeah, he probably will. What's up W?
Speaker 3Ben, you're like the big green giant right now. Yeah, all right oh, all right Tess oh, all right, tess oh.
Speaker 1You can shut off your phone now you can disconnect your connection. No, no, no, I don't need to see whiskey. You just said disconnect all that stuff.
Speaker 2Okay, okay, all right, all right where's the no?
Speaker 1get whiskey, get whiskey off of there oh, ben, it says uploads in progress.
Speaker 3We recommend you stay in the studio until all recordings have yeah successfully uploaded
Speaker 1okay, I'm gonna remove you right now, okay, all right, we're back. Look, look people. I'm gonna tell you right now test says that we were on mute for a lot of that. That was outside with the, the FST. I'm gonna tell you right now I'm twisted. Okay, wait, your phone is still on for some reason. Okay, that's fine. It's fine, stay in. That's fine, just turn the volume down all the way.
Speaker 1Okay, Wait, wait, hang on Wait wait, we got the key saying some stuff. What wait, we got key saying some stuff. What's key saying he was saying some stuff? Oh, he's laughing, huh. Well, the test, oh yeah, okay, all right, I'm going to tell you right now. Folks, I am three sheets to the wind. If you can tell by my speech pattern, you know we're gonna blow into this breathalyzer one okay, so how many, how many shots can we take?
Speaker 1nine, nine, nine. And we are what we are two hours and 12 minutes into this okay, and it's 8 12, and this is still after nine this is the long. This is the longest episode there ever has been in the history of this podcast oh yeah, I know we let. We left the studio door open. I am so slurring my speech right now, do it.
Speaker 3I've already wrote on the timestamp, okay, all right Breathalyzer, it's okay.
Speaker 1It's warming. Oh gosh, it's warming up. This is terrible. It is Two one, okay, blow.
Speaker 3I'm guessing one point. Okay, let's see, maybe 0.24.
Speaker 1Let's see.
Speaker 3Or point maybe 0.134.
Speaker 1Okay, 0.117.
Speaker 3That didn't go up that quick.
Speaker 1Seven hours and 47 minutes until Okay, I'm slurring. Seven hours and 47 minutes, wait, 47 minutes, wait. What does it say? Impairment of your motor? I don't even know motor coordination, whatever. I didn't even catch it all, but it's 0.117, that's, that's, that's, that's pretty toasty, yeah, and it's gonna keep climbing. Yes, and it's probably gonna keep climbing for the next at least.
Speaker 1At least the next hour could be in another 90 minutes that it keeps climbing for another two hours so even if I stopped drinking right now, which I'm going to do what, what, what, what, what, what did keith? Oh no, he didn't add any new comments just yet. Right, which I'm going to do. What did Keith? Oh no, keith didn't add any new comments just yet, right?
Speaker 3No, not yet.
Speaker 1Okay, all right, right now I am the jaw's numb. I can tell right now all my hand gestures. My movements are incredibly slow. I know my speech is slurred and I am trying to, at the best of my ability, not slur my speech, which is probably what you would be doing as the evening went. Tessa's probably like taking selfies of herself. She's like all puffing her lip.
Speaker 3No, I just superman in the back.
Speaker 1She's just oh my god, are you kidding me? Anyway, look, you see what's going on here. You see what's happened from the beginning of this show until now. We're nine shots in. I could taketh shot, but are you kidding me? Why? Why, I'm far gone. I'm already over the legal limit. I could tell I'm not speaking properly. I'm already above the legal limit. Like I said, see, trying to speak slower so that I speak properly. All that good stuff. That's how you know you're impaired. You shouldn't be behind the wheel of a vehicle, ladies. You shouldn't be allowing yourself to get. What are you? What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing?
Speaker 3are you kidding me tending to business?
Speaker 1yeah, I'm tending to business. Don't allow yourselves to get chatted up by guys. A guy, multiple, multiple guys, whatever it is. You already know. Look the breathalyzer told us our inhibitions were gone a long time ago. When that happens, promiscuity sets in. Don't allow that to happen to you. Ladies, Okay, I'm looking out for you. I'm looking out for girls like Tess. Okay, it happens a lot. This, it happens a lot. I'm sorry, I'm trying to collect myself here. You want to play bean boozled? See, see what happened. I couldn't even say bean boozled. Tess is so lucky she did not want to play bean boozled. She was like are you kidding me? I don't want to play Bean Boozled. She was like are you kidding?
Speaker 1me I don't want to play. Bean Boozled, oh my gosh. And she started crying Sit down, Sit down, girl, Sit down. But yeah, Tess was see, See, Right there. Cut him off First off. I probably should have been cut off like five drinks ago at least, right.
Speaker 3I guess I'm an enabler.
Speaker 1An enabler. We're doing this as a public service announcement. Remember, I'm doing this so you don't have to. Okay, you see, exactly as it's affecting me. As we've gone on, I didn't even say that, right, I could hear it in my head. Oh, it sounded fine. No, no, no, no, no, it wasn't coming out right. I know I'm slur in my head. Oh, it sounded fine. No, no, no, no, no, it wasn't coming out right. I know I'm slurring my speech. I'm what? Nine shots into this and we're, I don't know.
Speaker 3Well, do you want to hear the note that I wrote earlier?
Speaker 1Yeah, what'd you write earlier?
Speaker 3At 7.09, so just over an hour ago.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 3This is when I first noticed a few things. I put. Subject is more loose.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 3Taking longer to formulate ideas.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 3More use of slight raspiness in voice.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 3Words more spaced out.
Speaker 1Okay, right, right, right, right, right. And you know, first off, you know my speech pattern, you know that I use a lot of ands and uhs and I take a long time to tell stories and sometimes, especially when I'm telling a story, I talk slow too.
Speaker 3But but generally, when you're usually talking the you're, it's like you're going somewhere with that thought yeah and like the thought is formulated this was more like you were spacing, like you were like, and then Versus, you're normally like we did this and then we went Because, because, and now you know, but right now it was like that same riff was like we went and then there, like it's more like I don't know it took more time to collect my thoughts, like you were like having to put more thought right before it came out, right, okay yeah, yeah, I okay, but that's just because I know your speech very well because it could seem very normal to someone else, but to me it's like uh.
Speaker 1You know, I'm going to tell you what. I'm going to tell you what the jaw is really numb, the eyes are really heavy, my arms are really heavy right now, look, I'm tanked. I'm telling you that, right, look, look, I'm tanked. I'm telling you that right now I'm tanks. After nine drinks in two hours I'm loaded and it's uh, I have to get up really early in the morning.
Speaker 1I have to get up really early in the morning. Oh, I'm hoping this doesn't have an effect on me too much. I probably won't. But what are you eating? No, no, no, don't smell them all. First off, you can't smell whether they're good or bad, they're all going to smell the same. You can't. Tess is breaking into the bean boozled. No, no, no, no. Like what? This one right here what's this one?
Speaker 3buttered popcorn. No, no, no, no. This this one.
Speaker 1Here it's either chocolate or dog food. Chocolate or dog food all right, here we go. Wait, where'd it go? See, look, I can't even collect myself. I'm telling you I'm a mess oh oh, I'm telling you right now forget, forget about it, forget about it. I am long gone. Okay, all right. All right, what's that one? You said dog food, or what?
Speaker 3Probably chocolate something.
Speaker 1That's barf. It doesn't taste bad, so it must be chocolate.
Speaker 3Oh, that's barf.
Speaker 1No, you can't tell the difference when you smell them. You have to wait till you crack that hard. All right, really quick, really quick before. Okay, what was the last measurement?
Speaker 3You probably have another. Okay, it's been 10 minutes, you can go now.
Speaker 1Okay, and it was 0.17. 17, right, okay, all right.
Speaker 2Let's see.
Speaker 3Okay, warming up Four three two, that's after 10 shots, or still nine shots. Not, yeah, not no no, we're not doing a ten, I'm sorry okay, we're gonna close that I think it's telling you to wait, ben ben, it's not going, it's not, it's an error okay, let's try it again.
Speaker 1What happened, what? What did he say? I see, I look, I see this. I can't even see. I can't even see right now, yeah, but I can't even see right now, yeah.
Speaker 3Tesla, you're so close. It's just tests, thank you.
Speaker 2All right.
Speaker 1You like that, you like that Getting some recognition yourself, huh.
Speaker 3Thanks, key Shout out Key Maybe 0.129?.
Speaker 1Let's see, let's see what it says.
Speaker 3Maybe 0.13?.
Speaker 1Oh, it's 0.114.
Speaker 3It went down.
Speaker 1No, no, it did not. Yeah, really, we didn't have that well, we didn't have the 10th shot, so it gave it a little bit of time to come back down a little bit. But still, I'm telling you right now I'm messed up.
Speaker 3I'm messed up maybe it's because you're like bigger like. Maybe that's why, well like I said remember.
Speaker 1I mean, I'm six foot. As of today, 202.6 pounds, so that could make a difference. It's gonna affect me first off. After five drinks you would, you'd be on the floor. There's no, I took them at the frequency you did yeah, yeah, you'd be on the floor.
Speaker 3I there's no If I took them at the frequency you did, yeah, yeah, you'd be on the floor. I don't even think I could make it to nine shots in a night.
Speaker 1No, I don't think so either.
Speaker 3Maybe over a period of like five hours. Right, I could do like five.
Speaker 1Right.
Speaker 3Maybe one per hour.
Speaker 1Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3Or like a mixedeltzer maybe right in there, yeah, you know over like a six hour period, something like that.
Speaker 1But yeah shots within like a two hour period, absolutely like, yeah, like I've been taking drinks here all night. No, I mean nine shots in under, you know what? What has it been? Two hours 25 minutes. This is the longest episode we've had. Oh my gosh, I can't believe.
Speaker 1Listen, let them go soon bud I, yeah, we're gonna let you go. We're gonna let you go really soon, this. But this is did he say something else? I, I'm telling you right now people, he's sober, he's no, not even close. Yeah, not even close. We are going to let you go soon, but I hope that you stick around from the beginning to oh wait, what bean is this one? There's a bean right here.
Speaker 1Peetapin. See, you see, you see how discombobulated I get, I get distracted and all that kind of stuff. I know I'm slurring my speech. I can tell I'm slurring my speech. What is this one, this one's like I don't know.
Speaker 2I don't even know.
Speaker 3I can't even see I think or barf, you'll know if it's barf no actually no, I think it tastes pretty good.
Speaker 1You want to pick me out another one?
Speaker 3let's do the buttered popcorn or raw egg it seemed to taste.
Speaker 1Okay, it seemed to taste. Alright. What do we got? Let me take a drink of water. I assume it tastes alright. I don't know. What do we got there? Alright, let me take a drink of water.
Speaker 2I'm going to go right to sleep when this is over with.
Speaker 1I'm telling you right now I'm going to just crash out. Where are you going tonight?
Speaker 3anyway, I told you my friend's doing his first DJ gig.
Speaker 1Where is?
Speaker 3it.
Speaker 1Is it at the Observatory?
Speaker 3no, oh, okay, it's just like a bar, oh okay, let's see what this one is but it's this bar, like I don't know him he's trying to like make it a thing now because they're letting him dj. So they're trying to like promote this place and make it like a new spot no, this one kind of tastes like buttered popcorn really.
Speaker 1Yeah, it kind of does. Sorry, I know you're trying to like get me all right, give me another one. Oh my god, yeah, actually does. It actually does taste pretty good, I do like the buttered popcorn flavor.
Speaker 1Honestly, yeah, butter. You know what's funny is I told test we're gonna play bean boozled. She's like no, I don't, we were doing that. We were doing a camera test and a mic test. Before I have so many camera tests like in my library, I'm gonna put together a real one of these times of like all like kind of like a blooper reel. Can you move my head up right now? Sorry people, but um, um, tess was like I really don't want to do Bean Boozled and I'm like hey, that's just the way it is. But see what happened. She avoided it. I'm the one doing bean boozled not test?
Speaker 3you love doing bean boozled well, I don't.
Speaker 1Well, first off, I don't mind. I don't even mind. I mean, look the more challenge isn't the best thing in the world, but it's one of those things that you just to try to to uh to, to try to engage the audience and get them to participate in your show. You put up with it. It's one of those things I mean. Malort is an absolute awful. The way I describe the flavor of it is like mouthwash that's gone bad.
Speaker 3Ew.
Speaker 1No, it's absolutely terrible. All right, so let's see this one. Oh wait, this one looks like it could be like dead fish.
Speaker 3No, I think that one's stinky socks or Tutti Frutti.
Speaker 1I see yeah.
Speaker 3I know my Jelly Belly flavors.
Speaker 1Either I'm so far gone, Tess, or you just pulled out the wrong ones because it doesn't taste bad. It doesn't taste bad um oh my gosh, right right now, people look, I haven't even had when's the last time I had a drink test?
Speaker 3it's been at least 20 minutes right probably around 7 39, you would have taken the ninth one wait, hang on.
Speaker 1No, it's been a little bit longer. I mean, it's been, hasn't been quite that long. Let's put it this way it's been.
Speaker 3You logged the times yeah, at 7 39, after eight shots did .09, and you took the ninth shot at 739.
Speaker 1So we've done nine shots, okay, and we haven't done a shot in 40 minutes. Yeah, we haven't done a shot in 40 minutes and I'm telling you, I am.
Speaker 3But eat the jelly bean.
Speaker 1I'm blitzed people. I'm just letting you know I am loaded. Forget about it. I'm looking at my laptop right now. I can barely see myself. Okay, what's this one supposed to be? Are you calling somebody? No, you're taking pictures or something we do, it Come on. I'm responding Okay, I don't even know if this tastes bad. I'm just way too far gone. I can't even tell if this tastes bad. Tess, forget it All. Right, look, should we let everybody go now? Yeah, okay, tell you what.
Speaker 3Right, hang on, I do think it does kind of taste bad what happened. I'm just laughing at you.
Speaker 1Oh, I think it does kind of taste bad. Did Wait Hang on? Did Keith say something else? No, look, I can't even see right now. Honestly, I can't even see. I mean, of course I see, but people this is how important this is.
Speaker 1Again, my public service announcement to you. You see exactly what has happened to me over the last two hours. It's not good. Don't do this to yourselves. Okay, be responsible. Okay, all right With that, we're going to let everybody go. Should we let everyone go, tess? Okay, well, come on up to the. You can talk to you know. Come on up to the mic. Okay, we are going to let you go, larry, if you are out there still watching this. God bless you, larry. I love you. You know that, though, you're the best.
Speaker 3We've been on for two and a half hours and I've been just rambling.
Speaker 1I know. Okay, you can see what happens here.
Speaker 3You do that, sober.
Speaker 1What.
Speaker 3No rambling.
Speaker 1Okay, all right, we're going to let you go. I love you people, but before I do oh, you know what let's blow one more time. How about if we blow one more time?
Speaker 3All right, it's been 10 minutes.
Speaker 1It's been 10. Okay, it's warming up. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 okay. I think you went up or down oh, no, I think it went up 0.120. 0.120 no, I think it went up. Point one, two, zero. Is that up? Yeah, is it that's?
Speaker 3weird. You went point.
Speaker 1Maybe there was a misreading seven hours and 59 minutes until you're sober. It says there is significant impairment of your motor coordination. Point one, excuse me, sorry. Point one, two zero. Yeah, I, I definitely sorry. Now I'm starting to hiccup, like you know, like a guy who gets drunk. Point one to zero is exactly where it went after what I don't know like two and a half hours. Sorry about that, people. Thanks for hanging around. Thank you to Tess, she's the best she is. Where do I want to go with this? Oh, yes, this. Closing remarks. Yeah, yeah, I know, closing. I'm telling you I'm a mess, I am messed up here. This podcast, this program that's what it is. It's a program. This program is available wherever you get your podcasts, wherever you get your podcasts, all the podcast platforms out there, all the streaming platforms just search the Ben Maynard.
Speaker 3Please, louise, just get on with the Ben.
Speaker 1Just search the Ben Maynard program and you'll find it. Are you kidding me? See what I have to do. You see what I have to do? Don't do it, people. It's not worth it. Oh my gosh. And that's not because I'm not so unprofessional, that is because I'm hammered here. If you're watching on YouTube, if you're watching this entire train wreck, if you stuck around. Thank you so much, I hope. I hope you got the message. Where are you going, tess? Where are you going? She left. I hope you got the message. Please be responsible. Please do not get behind the wheel. Please have a designated driver. Please call a ride share, please, for yourselves, for everyone else out there. Please do that. Oh, thank you.
Speaker 1But, if you're watching on YouTube, please subscribe to the channel. Tell, look, tell 10,000 of your friends, please. I'm hoping. I'm hoping we get 500 subscribers before the end of the year. Okay, that's the goal 500 subscribers before the end of the year. Okay, that's the goal 500 subscribers before the end of the year. Whiskey's not your friend tonight, um, but if you're watching on youtube, again, subscribe to the channel, give me a thumbs up. Oh my gosh, this is thank you for tuning in I think that's our cue.
Speaker 3um, it was lovely being here with everyone tonight on this lovely Friday night, march 7th.
Speaker 1This is terrible.
Speaker 3This is absolutely terrible. We wish you all a very swell weekend. He said one more thing. Good night, fun stream.
Speaker 1You see. Look, he's going to bed. Keith, thank you very much. You've commented quite a bit tonight, so thank you very much, and thanks for tuning in too. I appreciate that too, and everybody who's watched. Thank you so much. If you listen to this at a later point, I greatly appreciate it. I know it's a lot, I know it's a lot, I know it's a lot, but it's a very, very important message, especially to see where I went from the beginning of the show to now.
Speaker 3We're getting close to three hours. Okay, all right, this is longer than a major motion picture, all right.
Speaker 1Let me stop, all right. So again, subscribe to the channel, because normally I'm not like this. This is the public service announcement. Give me a thumbs up and leave a comment. This is all for you. I again. I do this, so you don't have to all right tess, thank you so much, you're so thank you, ben.
Speaker 3You're so awesome for having me, and you know, of course, you know I love. What a great stream. All right, let's say bye to everyone I love you to pieces all right, bye everyone again.
Speaker 1Follow me on Instagram, simply Ben.
Speaker 2Maynard Program.
Speaker 1Again, we are done, thank you. Enjoy the rest of your evening. Everyone, have a great weekend. Please, please, please, take this to heart. Please take this to heart. I'm so very serious. I know this is kind of silly, but the message is very'm so very serious. I know this is kind of silly, but the message is very serious and very heartfelt. I love each and every one of you. This is the Ben Maynard Program. Tell a friend.